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Classes and libraries always deserves much more financial support - two key elements for the quality [3]
Recently,
peoplehave start
ed to
argue that universities should spend more money on
sports and social activities as they usually do on classes and libraries.
(give an example of how people would favor sports and social activities than classes and libraries) However, classes and libraries are
theessential part of universities that deserves prior
ity in the financial support.
(State your reasons why you believe this.)First of all, by improving the facilities of classes, both the quality of teaching and
studying will increase. My university is a good example in this case.
A professor who
taught Art History
shared his experiences with me .
Ten years ago, he
usually spared a whole day to prepare nearly
fifty picture sliders in order to show just two pages content in a book. Now, since all the classes has been
equipped with
computers and WIFI, he is able to spend more time to work on the content of class and think about how to show an image in different ways in order to help
student to understand it comprehensively. Students are also benefited from the great facilities. They now sit in a bright, clean classroom with internet available, water
machines , even stores. They can take note
s directly
on their
portable computers and check all the relevant
information immediately on the internet, which lead to a high efficient study.
(With this paragraph the sentence structure is unclear. Rearranging words in the sentence is something you might consider doing. I think that your ideas are good but they aren't clear. They are just touching the surface of the problem. Be more clear with what you want to say.)If
a university
was a human body,
the library
would be considered
the heart of that body. It is easy to understand that
we will do as much as
we can to keep
our heart
fresh and vivid(maybe "Alive and well?") . The amount of books
, collections
andmaterials of the library
is closely associate to the academic level of the college. No research program can be done without
the support of databases of the library. According to a survey
, conducted by China Social Academic Institution in 2009,
thirty percent
of graduate students
in Beijing
were willing to apply for the PH.D program of Peking University just because the library of Peking University is considered to be one of the
biggestl ibraries in Asia
.It contains a great number of English books as well as the most advanced statistic searching system.
(This paragraph is very good structurally. It sounds like a totally different writer. Try making the previous paragraph along the same lines as this one. Great job!)Admittedly , students should
practice sports and social activities as
much as possible
so they can to
stay health
y and enlarge their social circle. However,
this does not mean that
auniversity should distribute more money
towards that area . Instead, universit
iesshould encourage student
s to
exercise more by organizing various
competitions and ball games. Students are more likely to
practice their communication skill by arranging
different kinds of study groups in the campus.
( It seems like you are trying to find an alternative for the sports and social activities side of the argument but I would leave this paragraph out because it doesn't support your argument.)To sum up, classes and libraries always deserves much more financial support in university since they are two key elements for the quality and reputation of one university.
(This conclusion needs to be longer. Sum up all of your ideas here. It may be tedious but throughout your essay you explain so many different points. Its necessary to have a summary of your ideas at the end so the reader knows your key points.)Good essay overall, I hope these changes are helpful to you. Keep working on this one and it can be an amazing essay!