Writing Feedback / IELTS:Should the government spend money on poor population or hi-tech research? [4]

Nowadays, an increasing number of people are concerned about the government investment. However, whether should the money be spent on developing the hi-tech research or pulling people out of poverty is a controversial issue.I, personally, believe that it is more sensible and practical to invest money on needy population.

To begin with, it is well known that the hi-tech researches have been improved at a certain height, and it is not easily to achieve a breakthrough in a short period of time. Besides, hi-tech researches are both time-consuming and expensive, especially for those developing countries, which can result in a heavy burden. Moreover, no matter how advanced a nation's science and technology is, it does not worth all the money and efforts in doing so ,if people are living in poverty and still suffering from hunger. People in such countries definitely will not appreciate or understand how terrific the newest inventions and discoveries are.

A second point is that considering the long-term interests ,it makes more sense to invest poor population. A nation is governed by its people, and it needs their contribution. If the money can be spent on ensuring education and improving people's living standard, the reward a country is likely to get is priceless. When children in poor areas get opportunity to be educated, more talents and scientists are apt to be discovered and used ,which in turn accelerate its science research; when people have enough money to sustain their lives, the whole nation can develop and move forward in a safer and much more harmonious environment; both can bring the nation immeasurable benefits.

Nevertheless, that is not to say that hi-tech research is not vital for a country. Instead ,it is scientific and technological development the driving force behind the advancement of a nation. But, satisfying public's basic need seems to be a more urgent problem.

In sum, a country can be enormously enhanced by helping the needy. Meanwhile, I believe hi-tech could be developed with more high-qualified talents discovered from the poor after being educated.

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Any suggestions are welcome and THX for correcting errors.
Best regards!

Writing Feedback / IELTS - crimes committed by young people in major cities R&G [4]

QUESTION:Nowadays, the number of crimes committed by young people in major cities throughout the world is on the rise.What are the reasons? Give some solutions.

It seems to be an increasingly widespread problem that crimes are committed by the youth and I think mass media and family structure are definitely responsible for this.

A number of factors contribute to the juvenile delinquency and it is obvious that media the most powerful drive. Vulgarity and violence is shown on TV as profit-pursuing television companies want to attract more viewers. However, children are more vulnerable to offensive images than adults and accept them as nature and try to copy what is shown. For example, in Boston USA, a 13-year-old boy killed 30 students in his school after watching a TV program.

Another critical cause of crime is the changing family structure. Compared with nuclear families which are the norm of the day, the joint families in which grandparents used to teach moral values to children in early years have their unique advantage. Moreover, grandparents could also help keep an eye on the friend circle of their grandchildren. The fact that parents today are both working and children are left unattended at home makes these adolescents may fall into bad company and resort to drugs and prostitution under peer pressure. For drugs are desperately need money which turns them towards crimes.

In order to tackle this problem, in other words, to let the media provide children more appropriate TV and reduce series filled with detailed description of crimes, some censorship is needed. More importantly, joint family pattern should be encouraged and parents should spend more time watching TV with their children so that they know what their children are exposed to. Finally, government should try and reduce unemployment and poverty which are the root causes and promote well-rounded education.

Please kindly give me some suggestions ,thx.