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IELTS - despite the obstacles found in the new place, traveller could obtain some new experiences [6]
them
Travelling is one therapy for some people in order to refresh
them(no need Object here) from their daily activities. It is true that people prefer to spend their holiday
time(no need, neither) in a new and unique place, while others prefer to travel to a famous or common place. Although both choices could bring merits and demerits, I strongly
convince( I think you should use "agree", "convince" is a strong word, it's hard to use with adverb like "strongly") that travelling to a new place is always funnier and more challenging than travelling to familiar places.
Most people choose to travel in famous place usually visit such as
mall(mall? Its like super market ? I don't understand you clearly with this sentence. I think familiar places should be some places they have been there before and it should be a attractive place for tourists, i.e: beach where they have been there for 3 or 4 times, near their places and also famous). Indeed, it is more practice;
they do not have to prepare heavily due to the fact that it is a common place that
yo u extremely know
( they = you on same situation?). On the other hand, travelling in a new and different place will place you in the unpredictable situation. Therefore, people need to be
prepare more
( examples for this will make this sentence clearer) because those people do not know well yet the situation and condition at that new place.
However, travelling in a new and different place always brings us unpredictable and new experiences, while travelling in a familiar place sounds like a little bit boring trip. Travelling in an unpredictable place indeed will make us more tired, but it is more challenging. Are people having holiday to go out from their
daily boring activities?( familiar places are not daily places because they need to travel and they are on holiday not weekend)(Also, I think question sentence in here did not convince any thing, you should give more specific examples to make your point clear rather than questions. Furthermore, You should not use question in essay, its five but its too risky) So, I believe that
the obstacles found in the new place could bring some wonderful experiences that
could never be forgotten.
(model verb will be better if you are not 100% sure about that)To conclude,
despite the obstacles found in the new place(2 times for this phrases will never show your vocabulary range, there are many ways to rephrase it with the same idea.) , traveller could obtain some new experiences. In addition, people also could explore their knowledge by visiting the place where only a few people live and visit in there. In the other hand, visiting new places in holiday times could outweigh benefits based on my point of view.
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I hope this will help you. I am a student and I will take IELTS test this Decem. Good luck.
