Writing Feedback / IELTS: Doing same things vs Making change - Which is good? [5]

Topic: Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same thing and avoiding change. Others, however, think that change is always a good thing. Dicuss both view and give your opinion.

Some of us may define change as challenge. Accepting challenges means taking risk. Thus, some will encouter and overcome it regardless the result. However, some may evade facing it and stay secure. Before expressing my opinion on this matter, It is necessary to look at boths sites carefully.

To be able to adapt changes, we take in to account that it would affect our lives positively or even negatively. Nonetheless, no pain, no gain, Changes bring opporturnities to examine our ability of dealing with difficulties and do thing differently. Regardless what the outcome might be, we find out our weaknesses and lack, and from that we complete ourself. More importantly, it is definitely significant lesson and experience in our lifetime. Steve Jobs and Bill Gates are those living role model of changing mind set and common routine to pursuit their ambitious. They dropped out from in the middle of college and started working their own projects meanwhile their contemporary students had tried to finish studying and then find a job. And as we all know, they are now the most well know billionare all over the world.

In contrast, some people maintain their lives steady. They realise that they are sastified with their current condition. And it is not necsseary to make changes which would mess

up their regular living. I once asked my uncle, who has been working the same job for 20 years, about moving to other city for better job and higher salary. He simply answered " If I move to other city, it will cause inconveniences to my childrens to get familiar with new invironment and also interupt their upbringing".

Change is obviously natural, each of us have own way to confront. However, as a youth, I consider changes as sources of improvement in order to moving forward and earning new experience. Nevertheless, by accepting challenges, we gain more than we lose.

Writing Feedback / IELTS: improve health by increasing sport facilities; 'regimen of nutrition' [6]

Dear Friends,
I am new here and today I would like to need your adjustment for my writing as following topic:
Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sport facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little affect on public health and other measures are requried.

Exercise has become daily important activites in modern socicety. People aim to maintain a healthy habitas to live and work better. The rise of fitness centers, sport facilities have been creating more opporturnities for us to accomplished those tasks. In my point of view, to have fully positive affect to our health, besides bulding more sport facilities, having a reasonalbe nutrition regimen and reducing bad habbits, such as smoking, need to be taken in to account.

The majority of people concur that inncreasing sport facilities and equipments play an important role in the campaign of enhancing health in soicety. A strong soicety containts healthy individuals. Upon this rationale, goverments are putting more effort in this task such as building green park which is convenient for jogging and basics execerise. Further more, nowadays, in most of the designs for appartment blocks, sporty facilities such as playground for kids, swimming pool and gymclub are required from goverment as a common standard of a morden city.

In a different perspective, researchers has proove that, an effective regimen of nutrition also affects in our health. Fast food industry has booming over decades, resulting in the increasing of illness related to obese. Obese people are commonly diagnosed as diabete patients and other deadly symptom related to heart. A reasonable diet with more vegetables and less lipid and calories is helpful as well as nourishing for our heart.

And yet bad habbits influent our life style and one of the most stringing is smoking. Most of people are aware with diseases associated with smoking, typically cancer. Smoking causes cancer not only smoker themself but also second hand smokers. Many countried has strictly applied various menthod to reduce smoking such as impose high tax or purnishment of smoking in public such as Singapore.

In conclusion, health is valuable of each individual. And in order to maintain and improve our health, we need to use diversified menthod to be in optimum condition.And I strongly believe that with that combination we will prolong our life.