Posts by vinnymj [Suspended]

vinnymj

Oct 12, 2014

Undergraduate / my home for the next four years [NEW]

Tell us why you decided to apply to the University of Wisconsin-Madison. In addition, share with us the academic, extracurricular, or research opportunities you would take advantage of as a student. If applicable, provide details of any circumstance that could have had an impact on your academic performance and/or extracurricular involvement.I first heard about Madison University when I came across Harry Frederick Harlow and his work on the Rhesus Monkeys. As the first director of the Wisconsin Primate Research Center at Madison, I became very keen to learn more about the science department of Madison in our times. What I discovered did not disappoint me. The cutting edge research done by the science department and the well-known faculty members of today have only strengthened my desire to attend Madison in an effort to ensure that I receive only the best training and mentoring possible from my chosen academy of learning.

Friends, who previously visited the institution, describe it as a great environment, with positive and friendly people. It was not enough for me, I wanted to experience UW-Madison myself and what it has to offer. I was eager to visit campus, I made an appointment for the tour, and what i saw did not disappoint me. I was impresses by every building and their unique history. I was also pleased to learn about the different seasonal activities the university has to offer. As my tour went on they treated me not as outsider but rather as one of them, answering all my questions and told me all about their famous ice cream that is made ion campus. After the tour I Instantaneously knew madison was the school for me ,the overwhelmed warm welcome I receive impact me in a great extent that made me decide that madison must be my home for the next four years .

The positive and supportive atmosphere of the Madison campus will help create the perfect balance between my social and academic life. Knowing that I will always have loyal friends who are willing to help me when I am down and being enlightened by the highly learned professors of the institution will help me become a better version of who I am now in the next four years.

vinnymj

Oct 12, 2014

Undergraduate / "Culumbia is the place for me" [3]

Explain what you have to come to understand about their closely knit student campus and how you feel that exposure to both the academic and social aspects of Madison will help you learn more in a balanced environment that offers equal priority to the academic and social development of its students

vinnymj

Oct 1, 2014

Undergraduate / WHY MADISON? It would find me a great gain to part of their community [5]

can u please tell me what you mean by "Explain what you have to come to understand about their closely knit student campus and how you feel that exposure to both the academic and social aspects of Madison will help you learn more in a balanced environment that offers equal priority to the academic and social development of its students."

as for the essay this is what I have so far

I first heard of Madison University when I was doing a research paper about Harry Frederick Harlow and his famous experiments on rhesus monkeys. Harlow was the first director of the Wisconsin Primate Research Center at the University. His famous work led to the university to be very prestigious. When I concluded my research I immediately felt a desire to know more about the institution. I believe I can be a great asset to UW-Madison and bring upon more prestigious and new leading research to the university.

Friends, who previously visit the institution, describe it with as a great environment, with positive and friendly people. It was not enough for me, I wanted to experience UW-Madison myself and what it has to offer. I attended the tour, when I arrive to the school I was impressed it was then I knew Madison was the school for me.

If accepted I would like to study chemistry and neuroscience since, my research of Harlow have intrigue me to know more about the brain.
In terms of research opportunity I would definitely take advantage of exploring and understanding the brain. Since im incline to explores and develop ways to transfer ones identity to a computer, by recording patterns of electrical signals. This is why I believe Madison is the best institution for me since their research facility is recognizing as one of the best worldwide, and have teachers that could be great mentors such as Mathew Jones that study the Mechanisms of inhibitory synaptic transmission.

In high school I had the chance to be in the swimming team though I didn't make big I love every aspect of water. So as for extracurricular activities I would love to join the swimming club where I could be part of something greater than myself, a team.

I think Madison would find me a great gain to part of their community where not only I could learn from the best but also see what I give to the school.

vinnymj

Sep 28, 2014

Undergraduate / WHY MADISON? It would find me a great gain to part of their community [5]

Tell us why you decided to apply to the University of Wisconsin-Madison. In addition, share with us the academic, extracurricular, or research opportunities you would take advantage of as a student. If applicable, provide details of any circumstance that could have had an impact on your academic performance and/or extracurricular involvement.

I first heard of Madison University when I was doing a research paper about Harry Frederick Harlow and his famous experiments on maternal-separation, dependency needs, and social isolation on rhesus monkeys. When I concluded my research I immediately felt a desire to know more about the institution. I ask friends and friends of friends whom previously attended and visit the institution, they describe as an outstanding environment, with positive and friendly people. It was not enough for me to hear from others I wanted to experience and see with my own eyes what UW-Madison has to offer. So I decided to make an appointment for a tour once I got there I was shock, it was then I realize that University of madison was the school for me.

[...]

vinnymj

Sep 27, 2014

Undergraduate / Change for the better - melting pot adventure [7]

thank you for correcting my mistakes it really helps me a lot. I hope u like it, and please let me know if you find any other error

For seventeen years of my life, I have been living and learning in a multicultural environment.
At the age of ten my parents made the big decision that I would go live with my father and my stepmother. I left my home country of Venezuela and came to the United States where I hoped to experience a better life and expand my knowledge. I experienced the "melting pot" both at school and within my community as I began to speak both English and Venezuelan. Having to leave my country and my culture was one of the hardest things I ever had to do, but it has definitely changed me for the better.

Adjusting to life in the big city was a huge change. With my father constantly working and a sickly stepmother to care for, I had to learn to grow up fast in a strange, new world. I discovered of getting around by myself. So I developed patience for many things such as other people and developed a sense of self-reliance. I learned how to take public transportation and slowly began to learn the language. Sure I made mistakes, but every mistake I made was part of what I now believe to be character building exercises for me since I learned something new from each failure or mistake

I was given the privilege of sharing my immigrant story with Venezuelan students during one of my visits to the country. I shared my story of integration and the changes for the better that occurred as I became a part of American society. I was concerned about how the audience would react. Would they think I was a haughty and snobbish? Regardless of my concerns, I walked onto the stage and told them the story of how integrating to a new culture made a better person of me. As I watched their faces react to my story. I realized that I was not totally American nor was I still entirely a Venezuelan. But rather a person who managed to combine both cultures and creates a unique individual who could evolve as a person and an intellectual in any had given setting. The "melting pot" culture had successfully transformed me without my noticing it.

Now im a person capable of using the skills I have learned from all my past life stages. I have perfected my adult self to a great extent. I am looking forward to further advancing myself and taking advantage of the "melting pot" culture as I venture into my college studies.

vinnymj

Sep 27, 2014

Scholarship / Immigration has a cost----Questbridge Essay [5]

you might want to write a brief intro about what made you take such big decision, choosing American over India

vinnymj

Sep 26, 2014

Scholarship / Change the perception that students with family troubles are weak, pitiful, and unlikely successful [2]

"But that's just using your parents for college! It's not fair." That was my friend's response to my college counselor's story about a student who had chosen to write about the death of his mother. Little did she know, the cheerful girl she sat next to everyday in Global History struggled with family problems: a sick parent, a financially unstable family, and the possibility of becoming homeless. (parallelism?) In my competitive high school where even a GPA difference of 0.1 mattered greatly, I tried to camouflage among my middle-class peers by hiding my dark secret in Pandora's Box. (rephrase or ok?) While applying for the Questbridge Scholarship, I met others like me who are dealing with family problems whether it be (such as?) a divorce, the death of a family member or drug abusive parents. If there was one thing I could change in my community, it would be the attitude towards students who have struggling family problems; I would create a support foundation (network?) where students can meet other students , share struggles without considering social boundaries, support and encourage one another.(each other?) It is the support system I often wished for but never had.

you really need to go and revisit this paragraph you should not start an essay with a quote and without any sort of background first. from point on is not wise to keep reeding if you really don't have any sort of ground base.

hope this helps!!!

vinnymj

Sep 26, 2014

Undergraduate / Change for the better - melting pot adventure [7]

That of changing the direction of my future for the better with the help of my parents and a nurturing country

hi thank you for the feedback, I did some changes and took some of your ideas can you tell me what you think.

vinnymj

Sep 26, 2014

Undergraduate / Change for the better - melting pot adventure [7]

Prompt Consider something in your life you think goes unnoticed and write about why it's important to you.

For seventeen years of my life, I have been living and learning in a multicultural environment.
At the age of ten I left my home country of Venezuela and came to the United States where I hoped to experience a better life and expand my knowledge. I experience the "melting pot" both at school and within my community as I began to speak both English and Spanish. Leaving my country and my culture was one of the hardest decisions I have ever made, but it has definitely changed me for the better.

Coming from a small town, it was hard adjusting to the big city. My father always works and my stepmother was always sick at home, so I had to discover ways to get around myself. This led me to be more patient and self-reliant; I learn to take public transit. Though Occasionally I made mistakes however becoming self-reliant and patient taught me that mistakes are not failures but just one step before success.

Once I returned to Venezuela again, I was given the privilege of speaking to a group of Venezuelan students about my integration of American culture and how it changes me for the better. I was concerned about how the audience would react. Would they think I was a haughty person? Regardless of my concerns, I walked onto the stage and told them the story of how integrating to a new culture made a better person of me.

With time I learned my way around and became friendly with the neighborhood, however I learn something greater, patients as well as self-reliant, this skills have help me and change for the better as well as an incentive to try and be the better I can. Now I'm facing a new challenge to the story to my life, my life after I leave Illinois for college elsewhere, where my melting pot adventure will continue to prosper.