Unanswered [8] | Urgent [0]
  

Posts by VKWSSH99 [Suspended]
Name: VK WSSH
Joined: Sep 21, 2016
Last Post: Sep 21, 2016
Threads: 1
Posts: 3  
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From: Indonesia

Displayed posts: 4
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VKWSSH99   
Sep 21, 2016
Writing Feedback / (TED) Cameron Russell: Looks aren't everything. Believe me, I'm a model [5]

Cameron Russell is a 10-years-career model said for me, being fearless means being honest. She will answer questions that have been asked by many people however with a truthful twist. How does she become a model? She prevailed a genetic lottery and a recipient of a legacy. We have interpreted beauty not also as juvenile, high, slight, femininity and white skin and it is inheritance that she has been cashing out on, however there is less than 4% were non-white . Can she be a model when she grow up? She just really want to say to the little of her that she can be anything. Unfortunately, being a model is lack of knowledge and other life experiences. Next question, do they retouch all the photos? And she answered directly. Russell said there are many retouch in a photo but there is just a little component of what is occurring. She shows a few pictures of her that imbalance with the condition at that time. She said that is all not the picture of her but it is just a design by a group of professionals. The last question is what is it like to be a model? The respond that she never answered on camera is, if she is insecure due to the fact that she have to think how is her appearance every day. The last word she can said that she hope we all feel comfortable in knowing the strength of portrait in our apprehend éclat and abortive.
VKWSSH99   
Sep 21, 2016
Writing Feedback / The pie chart gives us information where people who travel to New Zealand come from [10]

Hi mem77,

I have few notes for you.

*For fulfilling requirement of Writing Task 1, at least you must have 150 words. In this writing you just have 145 words.

*The pie chart gives us information about where people who travel to New Zealand come from .
{it's little bit confusing, I suggest you to use - "The pie charts gives us information regarding origin of traveler that comes to New Zealand "

*According to that {you should use the , it cause you already explained what kind of data} data.....

*And also on that {you should use the , it cause you already explained what kind of data} chart, there are seven parts of chart {there is many repetition for this word, you can use it } to differentiate each country.
VKWSSH99   
Sep 21, 2016
Writing Feedback / EILTS Writing Taks 1 Origin of Writing in some Place [7]

Hi Alamsyah Ismail,

I have few suggestions for you to improve your writing.

- Your headline : EILTS {it should be IELTS } Writing Taks {it should be Task ) 1 Origin of Writing in some Place

- Ancient tribe believes {you should use simple past tense for stating a fact} that origin writing was started from a thausand years ago.

- Such as {this words too common you can use For instance } Egyptians who believe that their god.....

Good luck!
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