Scholarship / Gemi, nastiti, ngati-ati is Javanese philosophy my mother has always said to me CHEVENING Leadership [4]

@beauty60
Hello, there! First of all, I'd like to share one rule of this forum: Please post only one essay in each thread. Otherwise, the moderators will not read your extra essays and delete them. So please post the others in separate threads. I'm also a newbie to this forum and posted 2 essays at the same time and a contributor remind me that information. Secondly, I think you should focus more on the Major achievements you got by your leadership skill. Hope this would help! Cheers!

Writing Feedback / Wiriting Task 1 (The chart and table below reports about populations figures in Japan) [3]

@Delvisyendra
As I'm also trying to sit for IELTS, my comments might not be very useful. But these are the things I noticed with your essay:

- I don't see any information about 'Child Birth Restriction' or 'Birth control' in the graph. I feel like adding that information is not necessary.

- You should focus on the projection given in the graph (i.e 2035 and 2055)
- Some sentence structures are not clear and I don't understand full meaning of such sentences.
Best of luck! Cheers!

Scholarship / Chevening. I have selected a Master and Business Administration in order to continued my career plan [7]

Hello,
I'm also new to this forum and I'd like to admit that my English is not that good. In my opinion, your essay need to focus more on the reasons for choosing the courses (relating to your experiences). In fact, I'm having quite a bit of challenges on this question. Oh, I also think that you have much more spaces. I mean, you have many words to meet the max word limit. Hope this would help! Cheers!

Scholarship / Networking Skills is vital for success - Chevening [5]

Hello there,
I have to admit that my English is that good. But I think your essay didn't answer the questions fully. You might want to focus more on the networks you established rather than the situations of your hospital and the process of medical care. Hope this would help you!