"Astana Garden School" program - Motivation Letter for Scholarship

Motivation Letter for Scholarship

Dear Sir/Madam:
I am applying for a Scholarship at the "Astana Garden School" for a two-year program.
I am very fascinated about continuing my secondary school education to become a crucial part of your community and I strongly believe that "AGS" is the best choice for me. It would be more advantageous for me to continue my schooling in your school because of the high quality of education.

At the moment I am finishing 9th grade in "Kokshetau Bilim-Innovation Lyceum" where I have been studying for about 3 years. During these 3 years, my teachers helped me take an interest such as the English language, mathematics, and physics subjects. They explained to me that to be an altruist is some kind of glorious deal that everyone should develop by yourself. Also, they gave me so much advice that will come useful in further life. I am really appreciated to them and therefore I want to meet their expectations that they did teach me for good reason.

My plans on the next 2 years are to pass international examinations, in which I want to to get the highest scores and exert myself from the good side. I would like to do volunteering for good AGS association and participate as many as possible in sport and educational competitions. Moreover, at your school, I would like to meet such students that have a common goal with me and achieve the best working results which I believe will be the next big step in my development. In addition, studying at your school will significantly improve my chances to be admitted by top-universities. But the most important is that I hope your school will help me develop essential leadership skills that needed for every person in 21st age.

In conclusion, I would like to say that I am happy to have such opportunity to get the grant to study in "AGS" and I promise to be a worthy member that will demonstrate yourself as a talented student. Thank you very much for considering my essay. I look forward to your positive response.

Sincerely,
Anuar Yelamanov.

In paragraph one change crucial part of to personal asset to. Also spell out the numbers versus using them (example 3 years should be three years).

In paragraph two should read my teachers helped me to become interested in the English language. Also in paragraph two it should read My teachers explained to me that to be an altruist is of benefit enabling the development of self. The last sentence in paragraph two should read I really appreciate what my teachers have taught me and I desire to meet their expectations.....

Paragraph three - My plans for the next two years....... and I want to receive the highest scores...I plan to volunteer ...I would like to meet students with common goals ...But the most important expectation is that

In paragraph four - to have such an opportunity

I think that comission can see not enough personal motivation in your essay. I would to reccomend you add more information about your person as a human.