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'benefit from the opportunities' - Letter of Motivation for Master Program in Development Studies!


m4louso 4 / 14 6  
Nov 8, 2015   #1
Could anyone take a look at my motivation letter bellow? I feel this is too long and maybe confusing. I'd appreciate some feedback :-)

Subject: Motivation letter for a Master program in Development Studies

Dear Sir/Madam,

With this letter I would hereby like to express my motivation for applying to XX's Master program in Development Studies. I have recently graduated in International Relations at Pontifical Catholic University of Rio de Janeiro (PUC-Rio) and I would certainly benefit from the opportunities for intellectual development provided by a sustained period of graduate study.

Being a citizen from an emerging country made me aware of inequalities and development challenges from a young age. When I decided to pursue a degree in International Relations, my ultimate goal was to obtain the necessary academic tools to attempt to deal with the issues that surrounded and affected me the most. After passing the entrance exam at the best two universities in Rio de Janeiro, I applied to a full scholarship and was accepted to study International Relations at PUC-Rio. There I graduated with specializations in Academic Research and International Cooperation for Development.

My undergraduate studies were definitely important in laying the academic foundation that I needed to better understand the correlation between the international distribution of power and world poverty. However, the academic curriculum of the International Relations major was not enough to provide me with the in-depth knowledge of development challenges that I was looking for. In order to fill this gap, I sought to combine my studies with professional experiences. To further my academic skills, I worked as a Teaching Assistant and a Research Assistant for a PhD thesis on the relationship between foreign policy and industrial policy during President Lula government, which turned out to be an amazing opportunity to learn more about development issues and public policy making. I was also an intern researcher at the BRICS Policy Center, a think tank dedicated to the study of BRICS countries. There, I was part of the Development, Commerce, Trade and Investment research group and was a focal point during the Rio+20 conference activities.

I also looked for opportunities to gain hands-on experience with policy making and project management. I worked at a multinational company in the area of Government & Public Affairs, where I was responsible for monitoring the improvement of relevant regulation. While there I got the chance to participate in a series of public consultations and public hearings, which gave me a closer look to the policymaking process in Brazil. Later on, after a thorough selection process, I received the only scholarship available to PUC-Rio students for an exchange program at the United States. There I had classes at the United Nations with diplomats, policy makers and international agencies personnel. Besides, to further my practical experience with policy making, I was an intern at Earth Child Institute, an international NGO working to empower underrepresented children in the Amazon forest.

All of those experiences were crucial in reaching an understanding that I am most passionate about public policy and international development challenges. Therefore, I decided to pursue a career that will allow me to work in policy making while making a lasting positive impact in Brazil. My plan for the future is to be involved in the development, implementation, and evaluation of policies in government or international agencies.

After considerable research, I am sure that the XX's, with its equal strengths in theoretical, policy and practical skills, is the best fit for my interests and future career. Besides its internationally known reputation and a worldwide network of alumni, XX offers a specialized stream in Human and Social Development that is particularly interesting to me. It directly connects to my plans of working for local governments developing and implementing projects related to socioeconomic policies. Besides, the interdisciplinarity of this program will provide me with a holistic view of the subjects that is essential for a professional who has to solve complex problems.

Given my past history of commitment to the study of development challenges, I am confident that I will bring a high level of energy and enthusiasm to your program. I am sure to exceed your expectations, because of my academic skills as well as the experience gained from my internships. Furthermore, my international background and interdisciplinary education will add more diversity to your program. I understand that you will attract the best candidates in the field and I am confident that I would flourish in that environment.

Thank you for considering my application, and I look forward to your acceptance.
justivy03 - / 2,366 607  
Nov 8, 2015   #2
Mayara, I'll work on your essay, I'd like to let you know that a motivation letter, though it says it's a letter, it still needs to be written in an essay format.

It would help if you do a little research before coming up with your letter, how to do it, what are the information to include, the body of the essay and your personal inputs, this are just a few elements of the motivation letter and an essay as a whole.

So let me see what I can do, first three paragraphs first.

- With this letter I would herebyI would like to express

- Being a citizen fromof an emerging
- tools toand attempt to deal with
- After passing the entrance exam at the bestin two of the best universities in Rio de Janeiro,
- There I graduated with specializations in

- on the relationship between foreign policy and industrial policy
- during President Lula's government,

This are my thoughts so far, I'l get back to you for the rest of the essay.
justivy03 - / 2,366 607  
Nov 8, 2015   #3
Mayara, below are the final remarks.

4th paragraph
- There I had classes at the United Nations with diplomats,
- BesidesIn this regard , to further my

5th paragraph
- All of thosethis ( however the verb is done in the past, you are referring to our credentials and they should take the present form )

- pursue a career that will allow me to work in policy makingon formulating policies while making

Final paragraph
- Given my past history of commitment and dedication to the study of development challenges,
- I am confident that I will bring a high level of energy and enthusiasm to yourthe program.
- I am sureaim to exceed your expectations,
- because ofwith my academic skills
- I am confident that I would flourish in that environmentwithin the institution to be of service to the nation .

There you have it, the only thing that I want you to remember is to make sure that when you are writing a letter of motivation, know that you are writing to build yourself up and make yourself known to the institution, that you can be a great addition to them as much as they are to you.


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