Letter to express my interest in applying to the Information Systems Management (ISM) master degree

please help and give advice for improving....

motivation letter - ism

Dear Sir or Madam,
I am writing to express my vigorous interest in applying to the Information Systems Management (ISM) master degree.
First of all, currently I am studying a BA degree in Business Administration at the Baku Engineering University. Besides the education, I have a job in Azmarketing LLC as a marketing expert which helps me a lot to build a strong background for my future career and my core duty is related with technology like researching and analyzing a variety of marketing information. But due to lack of IT skills I left behind and can't meet the technological demands of today's market which is getting bigger as technology improved and integrated more to the business world by every passing day.

In order to improve the necessary skills to succeed in today's market I tried to learn from online courses, books etc. but no matter what I did it is not enough to compete with a new era that technology brings. I have decided to leave the job to experts in this field and take a master degree with teachers who had enough experience and knowledge about Technology. I have adjudicated to apply for this program because I am sure that it would enrich my future studies strongly and assist me in my prospective career. I have chosen to apply for ISM master degree because I really like the study plan and especially appreciate the wide range of offered courses and the freedom in making your study plan. Many of the courses offered are unique for me because there is no equivalent at my home university. And minor specializations gives me the opportunity to deepen my knowledge and skills in a field that is of my interest or to broaden my horizons by discovering a whole new area of study which is I extremely ravenous about.

I investigated for months and took advice from my friends and finally found VSE and fell in love with it because of many reasons. The program I applied for is the 6th best programme in Eastern Europe according to the Eduniversal Ranking, that was the first sign for me that my choice was absolutely right. Diving deep in searching I found 'xPORT' Business Accelerator in which I can put into practice my ideas of contributing to society with any kind of method. I want to benefit from people who have great experience and knowledge to teach me the skills I need in the IT field and it would be a great honor for me to learn from the doc. Ing. Ota Novotny, Ph.D., Ing.Martin Potancok, Ph.D. and other great experts in the Information Technology field. Moreover, I am confident that my experience in VSE would be extremely exciting, fun, and valuable for both my studies and overall general development.

Thank you for considering my request. I look forward to your positive response.
Yours faithfully,
Zamir Abdulzada

Zamir, your motivation is somewhere in this version of the letter. I can sense it is there but, I simply cannot read it. It is not clear enough in your statements. You have to focus this on the motivation for your studies at the university alone. Try to provide simplified paragraphs that explain the following:

1. Explain why you would rather study an ISM masters immediately rather than working after graduation. Use an academic motivation for this paragraph. Focus on why you are changing your career focus from business administration to ISM. You need a strong academic motivation that will connect the two course paths somehow and create a logical motivation for your career change.

2. Explain why the academic motivation will help you become a better IS manager. This will represent your professional motivation. Answer the question, "Why ISM? How does it relate to Business Administration professionally?"

3. Try to give a personal reason for choosing this masters course as well. It's ranking in the Eduniversal ranking means nothing to the reviewer. That whole paragraph does not explain a reason that could pass for a motivation for choosing this university. It is public knowledge and doesn't really help the application.

For the closing statement, you can use the following part:

I want to benefit from ...overall general development.

That would sound like you having a personal motivation for choosing the university and, with the proper revision to the paragraph, will help you close the motivation letter on a strong note.

Thanks for the comment. But Business Administration and Information Systems Management are not so far from each other I'm just tightening my major not shifting one is administration and other is management. Can you give advice from this perspective?

Instructions 2 and 3 still apply to the revision of your essay. The change to the first instruction will only be that you explain your interest in the course as having its basis within the "tightening of my major" reason that you provided. Once you clearly explain why you feel a need to tighten your major, then the reviewer will also understand that you are not changing career paths but rather, increasing your potential to become a better skilled worker in this field going forward. That was the only confusing part of your essay as far as I can tell. The rest of the essay needs additional explanations just the same. The explanations should apply to the discussion points that will help the reviewer understand what your future career plans are and how your academic training fits into the scenario. Discuss it as a continuing education option to help reinforce the idea that you are undergoing these studies to help you update your theoretical knowledge and update your practical skills to help prepare you prepare for a more demanding future as a professional