This is the main chunk of a query letter I'm about to send out. Are there any obvious mistakes, grammar, typos or otherwise? Especially commas. Never can quite get my commas perfected.
Thanks!
Iza
Real magick scares people as much as it fascinates them. Where does the power come from? Is it real? Is it safe? What are the limits? Can I actually learn to perform magick myself? {book title} is a 280 page nonfiction how-to of ritual magick for neophytes and experienced magicians alike. This book incorporates the essentials of modern magick into a sane, rational, and digestible form.
The {series title} series is the culmination of my passion and study of esoterica for the last twenty-two years, including extensive experience with Qabalah, Golden Dawn, Thelema, Wicca, and Shamanism. I have worked with various magickal orders, including those which practice sex magick. I teach workshops and private classes on magick and run an occult message board online. I have distilled all my lessons into the most essential elements for anyone to practice and understand.
New Age books have long been spreading successfully into other areas that were once exclusive to self-help and psychology. New Age products and sidelines generate an annual revenue of $46 billion dollars, while in 2008 alone, Americans spent $11 billion on self-improvement books, CDs, and seminars. It's not a matter of do people buy New Age and self-help books, but instead the question is how to capitalize on the varied subcategories that fall under the mind-body-spirit banner. Potential sequels in the {series title} line of magick books include, but are not limited to: {several titles}.
Perennial bestsellers, such as Scott Cunningham's Wicca, and recent hits like the Four Agreements by Miguel Ruiz (and its sequels) show that readers still crave ancient spirituality so long as it is wrapped up in a modern package. My book follows in this tradition, utilizing the best rituals and concepts from all popular forms of magick, pinning them down with a touch of historical accuracy, and ultimately presenting an easy-to-follow format for getting results with magick.
This is a great essay, I could only find a couple minor things to point ouit:
It's not a matter of whether people buy New Age and self-help books, but instead the question is how to capitalize on the varied subcategories that fall under the mind-body-spirit banner.
Potential sequels to the {series title} line of magick books include, but are not limited to: {several titles}.
Good luck with your book!
: )
Your years of experience are impressive. I would like listen to what anyone has to say if she has 22 years of experience in spiritual practice. I guess if I was looking to criticize this, i would say that it celebrates natural magick in general but does not really make any assertion that show that YOUR unique contribution here is worth buying. Are you just saying what Cunningham and others say? If you are a student of Cunningha's work, why will readers want to read your book?
"I have distilled all my lessons into the most essential elements for anyone to practice and understand." This is vague. What do you actually teach? What will I learn from you that I will not learn from the other books? You MUST be able to capture in words something that has the ring of truth. If you tell a little truth about natural energy, the reader will recognize it as truth! :-)
