Buddhist cloister. Is it an acceptable introductory paragraph for Chevening Leadership/influence?

to make an impact

I would be really appreciated your comments.

Early age, I made my school journey by staying in one of the Buddhist monasteries. I always wanted to be a leader who would make an impact on the rural communities. In 2016, I became the youngest official tour guide in Siem Reap. Every week, I guide different travellers. I always make friends and become part of their family, so they still feel home. Based on my experience, I believe that leadership is to influence and inspire people to learn and explore for the positive impressions on my country.

@Lao
Hi there. Welcome to the forum. As always, we're happy that you're here. I hope you find this feedback to be beneficial for your writing. If you do, please do approach us for more writing.

While I find that your writing is short and sweet, it would also be nice if you can provide more context and details. Doing this will improve how lively your text is, taking into account that written work should be taken in like this. Remember that readers feed off from details that'll sharpen their imagination as to how the flow of text would be. For instance, you can talk about a memorable experience you had as a tour guide. Who has stricken your heart and made you love the career? The more specific you are, the better.