Courage to Grow Scholarship: The question is why do I deserve this scholarship?

Growing up in a single parent household is difficult and I do not wish for anyone to grow up without another parent in their life. Though we do not live in a perfect world, life without two parents can happen. I grew up with just my mother and sister and my mother knew that my sister and I could be something more in this life such as a doctor or an engineer.

I am maintaining good grades in college and high school, participating on a year round swim team going onto eight years, and work as a swim instructor and lifeguard. I have my mother to thank for guiding me in the right direction, which she always wants us to be stronger, driven women who can over come any challenges thrown in our path.

However like any college student, the issue of money becomes a difficult challenge and sometimes, I cannot control it. My university has become my second home and I wear my university colors with pride, but I do not want the issue of money to interfere with my attendance. I want to further my education and with this scholarship, it will help me tremendously with paying for my undergraduate Chemistry degree. I deserve this scholarship because I have worked this hard and I do not want to see my dreams ripped away from me. This will set me in the right direction as far as growing into a more mature, educated adult and becoming a Dermatologist after my undergraduate years.

It's a bit over the 250 word count, but I have trouble with tenses so should I write in past or present tense? Any suggestions are appreciated.

Thanks!

I deeply regret the life you're have. Living without father is really full of sorow that you have to survive. But I think that you can achive your goals and make your dreams come true with your great effort. I strongly believe that you can do it!

When you state a series of facts of your past life, you should use past simple tense in almost cases. But you can sometimes use present perfect tense instead in appropriate situation.

I grew up with just my mother and sister and my mother knew that my sister and I could behave something more in thismy own life such as a doctor or an engineer.

Thank you so much! This has helped tremendously :)

That first paragraph is uneventful. SO many people have single parent households. You need a new concept to add a new dimension to the essay. If you want to have great success despite adversity, you have to get passionate about a plan for the future.

That is the way to write a great essay. (However, it might drive you crazy. It is good to relax into your life situation, but when you write an essay like this show that you have a plan with several short term goals.) :-)


What dreams? I want to know about the details of the dream. If you tell the reader how this scholarship will affect the way you achieve your goals, the reader will want to view you favorably.

Just a quick thought,

" I deserve this scholarship ..."

try and sound really determined here, since it's the clinching point that either makes or break your application.

ie, "I deserve this scholarship because I am determined and tenacious, as evidenced through my grades in school and unwavering effort in ..."

Change "I have my mother to thank ..." to "My mother, a constant figure throughout my life, instilled in me the importance of persevering in the face of challenges" or something like that. It makes that statement sound stronger and makes it more personal in a way.

It is equally important to have a strong start to your essay. It is the hook that grabs the reader.

Put in more work on it and you'll do great.

Break a leg!