'following through with hard work' - why do you deserve this sponsorship?

There is small box on a sponsorship application form,where i need to fill in a paragraph stating why i deserve a sponsorship.

The paragraph is as
follows.
I deserve this sponsorship,because i have the ability to follow through with all the hard work it will take to achieve my dreams and goals.I trust in myself and i believe,this sponsorship wil be the foundation i need to build a better me,and enable me to become an inspiration to others through my academic success.

I deserve this sponsorship because I will work hard and do whatever it takes to achieve my dreams and goals. I trust in myself and believe that this sponsorship will be the foundation I need to build a better me.This scholarship will enable to become an inspiration for others through my academic success.

You need to be a little more specific about what your dreams and goals actually are, and why you want to achieve them so badly. How will the scholarship "build a better you"? What specifically will the scholarship be paying for? These are all questions you should be answering through your paragraph.

Here are some of my corrections.

I am worthy of this tuition, and maintainance sponsorship because i will work hard and do whatever it takes to achieve my goal of furthuring my studies,and a life long dream of impacting change in my country,through academic excellence.I trust in myself and believe that this sponsorship will be the foundation i need to pursue my vision and abition.Therefore,this scholarship will enable to become an inspirations for others through my educational success.

I am worthy of this tuition and maintenance sponsorship because I will work hard and do whatever it takes to achieve my goal of furthering my education.I dream of being able to impact my country through academic excellence. [But how will you use academic excellence to impact your country? Lots of people get good grades and don't impact their country. What will you do with your education? What do you want to study in college and what career do you want?] I trust in myself and believe that this sponsorship will be the foundation I need to pursue my vision . [What is your vision?]This scholarship will enable to become an inspiration for others through my academic success.

You still are not clear enough.