Good day! I'm an applicant for this year's GKS, and has been tussling with my essay for fair two weeks. Finding that pinpoint balance of being direct and professional while begin outstanding has been a dilemma, as I'm hopping between being *too* boringly clinical or too catastrophically personal. I had my first draft read by a teacher, and on note, was told to incorporate as much as I did possible, which I worry could make the final product a bit cluttered, so that's an extra thing to mind.
Here's a third draft I had: Critcism and suggestion, feedback of any kind, is strong encouraged and welcomed! Thank you very dearly in advance for your time.
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By studying in Korea, a global centre in fields of STEM and engineering, I aim to gain the technical expertise and cross-cultural experience needed to advance automation in Mongolia and foster stronger Korea-Mongolia relations. Here, I will illustrate how a combination of my history, accolades, and aspirations makes me a potential candidate for the GKS program.
To commence, begin the grandchild of a mining company founder, I annualy took residence on work sites since I was 4. Occupying my summers with industrial machinery, smell of diesel, and riding on trucks, it cultivated in me a strong fascination with engineering. Young and guileless, I had a vague vision of engineering, but knew I wanted to have a career that incorporated it since I was in kindergarten.
However, as soon as I was enrolled, limited resources and teacher availability started my foundations in science weak. Inversely however, despite it's hinderance to my early set of academic, this circumstance had unwittingly led me to approach my learning years more intuitively. Instead of relying solely on the standardised curriculum, I took up various activities and resources in STEM (online simulations, books and articles on science) and absorbed myself in them. Progressing onward, from middle school to the present, I curated a selective circles of hobbies of consuming and creating scholarly articles, auditing university-level courses (CS50 And Circuits & Electronics, notably), and in my junior year, becoming an automobile kit hobbyist. Committing myself to these extracurriculars, I advanced various hard (Amateur electronics, Python, C1 English) and soft skills (Critical reasoning, Adaptability) that I would not have had the chance to achieve in other circumstances.
This initiative mentality, in turn, exponentially improved my academics. What I lacked and fell behind on, instead of ruminating, I instead largely focused on finding a way to counteract. Not only had this accelerated my speed in digesting and finishing coursework greatly, I became comfortable enough with the syllabus to top rank in all physics contest hosted within my school, tutor my peers, and regularly aid teacher in teaching the coursework. Aiding to organizing 200+ people event, coaching and teaching in the Robotics club, and winning a national medal (XVI National Art Contest) for my school were one of the more notable contribution to me. During these, I had learned that perseverance is sometimes better than just ingenuity alone. Beyond my desire to excel in the field, practising discipline and working even when under overbearing blockage or pressure was critical to my progress.
On a corresponding note, during my senior year, I interned with Young Engineers NGO, providing accessible education about engineering to people of all backgrounds. Working alongside professionals and fellow students broadened my perspective on how diverse yet interwoven the field is as a whole. Thus, KOREATECH'S 4C values strongly resonate with me. Technical expertise alone is insufficent: Engineering at it's core relies on communication, teamwork, and on a minor footnote, humanitarian knowledge.
KOREATECH's emphasis on the ethics of engineering work is very evocative to me. Having engaged with humanities as much as I have with the scientific, understanding the impact and safety of mechanism I conceived is vital to me as the productivity of it. Begin active in society installed in me a sense of responsibility regarding engineering. Having attended a field work in Erdenet coal mine, one of the largest mining corp in my country, interviewing and engaging with the equipments left on me a long-lasting impression: Despite digging out mineral that is 30% of Mongolia's revenue, majority of the technology in usage was from 80s. Listening to managers concerns about faulty equipment, workers difficulty operating the available tech had cemented me my pursuit to help make technology accessible for my nation. Further, once qualifing as a delegate for AYIMUN's DISEC (Disarmament & International Security Committee) but being constrained by financial limitations, I still sought way to instead communicate with the delegates and gain awareness of how such conferences are dealt with.
I am particularly interested in Korea's leadership in automation and semiconductor technology. These areas have profound implications for Mongolia's mining industry, where efficiency and sustainability are critical issues to improve. By applying the expertise I acquire in Korea, I aim to introduce automation solutions that enhance safety and productivity in Mongolia while fostering long-term Korea-Mongolia technological cooperation.
Korea's reputation for its engineering industry makes it an ideal environment for my academic aspirations. The nation's emphasis on interdisciplinary research and innovation aligns with my conviction that engineering requires both depth and diversity of knowledge. Corresponding to the university's core beliefs, my own interest, KOREATECH to me is ideal in it's philosophy, state-of-the-art laboratories, and pedagological structure.
My goals, ultimately, extend beyond personal success. I intend to mentor students in my home country, encouraging them to embrace global education as I have. In the long term, I envision contributing to collaborative projects that integrate Korean innovation with Mongolia's industrial development, creating pathways for mutual progress.
Here's a third draft I had: Critcism and suggestion, feedback of any kind, is strong encouraged and welcomed! Thank you very dearly in advance for your time.
====
By studying in Korea, a global centre in fields of STEM and engineering, I aim to gain the technical expertise and cross-cultural experience needed to advance automation in Mongolia and foster stronger Korea-Mongolia relations. Here, I will illustrate how a combination of my history, accolades, and aspirations makes me a potential candidate for the GKS program.
To commence, begin the grandchild of a mining company founder, I annualy took residence on work sites since I was 4. Occupying my summers with industrial machinery, smell of diesel, and riding on trucks, it cultivated in me a strong fascination with engineering. Young and guileless, I had a vague vision of engineering, but knew I wanted to have a career that incorporated it since I was in kindergarten.
However, as soon as I was enrolled, limited resources and teacher availability started my foundations in science weak. Inversely however, despite it's hinderance to my early set of academic, this circumstance had unwittingly led me to approach my learning years more intuitively. Instead of relying solely on the standardised curriculum, I took up various activities and resources in STEM (online simulations, books and articles on science) and absorbed myself in them. Progressing onward, from middle school to the present, I curated a selective circles of hobbies of consuming and creating scholarly articles, auditing university-level courses (CS50 And Circuits & Electronics, notably), and in my junior year, becoming an automobile kit hobbyist. Committing myself to these extracurriculars, I advanced various hard (Amateur electronics, Python, C1 English) and soft skills (Critical reasoning, Adaptability) that I would not have had the chance to achieve in other circumstances.
This initiative mentality, in turn, exponentially improved my academics. What I lacked and fell behind on, instead of ruminating, I instead largely focused on finding a way to counteract. Not only had this accelerated my speed in digesting and finishing coursework greatly, I became comfortable enough with the syllabus to top rank in all physics contest hosted within my school, tutor my peers, and regularly aid teacher in teaching the coursework. Aiding to organizing 200+ people event, coaching and teaching in the Robotics club, and winning a national medal (XVI National Art Contest) for my school were one of the more notable contribution to me. During these, I had learned that perseverance is sometimes better than just ingenuity alone. Beyond my desire to excel in the field, practising discipline and working even when under overbearing blockage or pressure was critical to my progress.
On a corresponding note, during my senior year, I interned with Young Engineers NGO, providing accessible education about engineering to people of all backgrounds. Working alongside professionals and fellow students broadened my perspective on how diverse yet interwoven the field is as a whole. Thus, KOREATECH'S 4C values strongly resonate with me. Technical expertise alone is insufficent: Engineering at it's core relies on communication, teamwork, and on a minor footnote, humanitarian knowledge.
KOREATECH's emphasis on the ethics of engineering work is very evocative to me. Having engaged with humanities as much as I have with the scientific, understanding the impact and safety of mechanism I conceived is vital to me as the productivity of it. Begin active in society installed in me a sense of responsibility regarding engineering. Having attended a field work in Erdenet coal mine, one of the largest mining corp in my country, interviewing and engaging with the equipments left on me a long-lasting impression: Despite digging out mineral that is 30% of Mongolia's revenue, majority of the technology in usage was from 80s. Listening to managers concerns about faulty equipment, workers difficulty operating the available tech had cemented me my pursuit to help make technology accessible for my nation. Further, once qualifing as a delegate for AYIMUN's DISEC (Disarmament & International Security Committee) but being constrained by financial limitations, I still sought way to instead communicate with the delegates and gain awareness of how such conferences are dealt with.
I am particularly interested in Korea's leadership in automation and semiconductor technology. These areas have profound implications for Mongolia's mining industry, where efficiency and sustainability are critical issues to improve. By applying the expertise I acquire in Korea, I aim to introduce automation solutions that enhance safety and productivity in Mongolia while fostering long-term Korea-Mongolia technological cooperation.
Korea's reputation for its engineering industry makes it an ideal environment for my academic aspirations. The nation's emphasis on interdisciplinary research and innovation aligns with my conviction that engineering requires both depth and diversity of knowledge. Corresponding to the university's core beliefs, my own interest, KOREATECH to me is ideal in it's philosophy, state-of-the-art laboratories, and pedagological structure.
My goals, ultimately, extend beyond personal success. I intend to mentor students in my home country, encouraging them to embrace global education as I have. In the long term, I envision contributing to collaborative projects that integrate Korean innovation with Mongolia's industrial development, creating pathways for mutual progress.
