"the great gift of talent in English" - Gates Millenium Scholarship Essays

I thought the due date was the 15th rather than today so I am rushing to crank all these essay out with the best quality in the time allotted. Any kind of feedback would be greatly appreciated.

Discuss the subjects in which you excel or have excelled. To what factors do you attribute your success? (7800 characters maximum length)

I have been blessed with the great gift of talent in English. For as long as I can remember I've had a knack for spelling, grammar, and syntax in the English language. My spelling tests were always graced by a gold star in elementary school and I was even selected to participate in several district spelling bees. I was shocked to find that in middle school I was already reading at a college level based on tests. As the subject of English began to require more and more thought and creativity rather than just a good vocabulary, I saw that my essays had a cookie-cutter quality to them; nothing distinguished my essay from the person sitting next to me. I pushed myself to stylize my writing and break away from the formulaic mold my middle school teachers instilled in the class. The potential I saw in myself to do better caused my writing ability to sky-rocket to what it is now. I can only attribute my natural connection, intolerance fro mediocrity, creativity to my success in this crucial subject. Many people who read some of my writing tell me that I should be a writer. I always make an effort to not simply present facts and reasons but use the best of syntactical ability and rhetoric to portray topics with intelligence and my own unique flair in order to engage whoever's eyes fall upon one of my essays.

I've been writing and rewriting this post for quite a number of times but here is the frank version:

You should NOT write about being such a great writer and having a "talent" in English with this essay. You say you try to add unique flair but there isn't any, at least not to my eyes that fell upon your essay. It's quite flat and rather boring (not to mention a bit ridiculous because of the subject matter)

You should probably write about a different topic.

As a rule, you generally don't submit an essay claiming how good you are writing essays especially when your essay can't back that up.

I'm sorry but good luck.

Could you provide me with an example of what is "good writing" in your eyes so that I can try to adjust my essay accordingly?

i agree and disagree a bit with "Envie" (his nickname is pretty suggestive, hahaha)

First of all, I think you essay is too short. They give you a max of 7800 characters and you only have like 1300 characters. At least try to make it up until 4000. I'd say it would be better to stay between 5000-7800.

Secondly, your essay is not boring. It does have a flow and the word choice is pretty good. I wouldn't say that your essay does not back up that you are a good writer.

However, when I look at the prompt asks you which subjects have you excelled and why do you think you have excelled in them. Now, your essay does not answer the second part of the prompt. You show us how you were always a good writer, but the questions wants you to think and reflect uopn why is that so. Did someone influence you to be a good writer? How did you fall in love with writing? Was there a particular book that served as an inspiration to you? Answer the second question of the prompt.

Could you please take a look at my essay? I would very glad! Thx! :)

here is a little typo.

Ha ha, tis is an interesting thread. Well, H.J. may have been a little harsh, but I cannot disagree with the main idea. You do indeed write without errors, excellent grammar, but to say you are an excellent writer is like saying you are an excellent painter. It means nothing to us unless you show us. And if indeed you are an excellent painter, what is the best thing to do? Talk about it throughout a long paragraph? Or should you refer to vents that deomonstrate it, so that the reader draws her own conclusions.

If you really want to be a great writer, find On Writing by Stephen King.

:-)

P.S. if you grew up learning English as a second language, and you picked up faster than other people, that is different. But if you are someone who grew up speaking English, ust saying you are a good writer is like saying you are an excellent musician. What instruments do you play? What kind of writing do you do? What literary styles do you admire, like Raph mentioned...