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Leadership will open up the meadow of endless leadership and influential values to be harvested from



haekalalasyari 1 / -  
Nov 1, 2018   #1
Guys please help me review this part of my Chevening Essay.

Adaptability, Creativity, and Authenticity



Chevening is looking for individuals who will be future leaders or influencers in their home countries. Explain how you meet this requirement, using clear examples of your own leadership and influencing skills to support your answer.

I am not afraid to acknowledge and be honest with myself that there are more major failures compared to the successes in my life. For me failure is an accomplishment for its invaluable learning process. I have been influenced by many excellent academicians, and will strive to influence more people myself. In doing so, there are three substantial values to be nurtured: Adaptability, Creativity, and Authenticity.

In the past, my stages of education have been very nomadic. Moving schools from Jambi, Melbourne, and Banten became an opportunity to consistently adapt and adjust to my surrounding environment. I observed how my peers studied, and it raised my awareness in different learning styles. After receiving a Bachelor degree, I became an English teacher at IONs International Education and had the opportunity to engage with students from elementary up to postgraduate level coming from different parts of Indonesia. I always positioned myself as a friend to them who also wishes to improve my English. At every last 10 minutes, I invited them to dream big. Encouraging to preserve our English abilities and how it is imperative to reaching our dreams. This would be impossible if I had not gone through my early adapting stages.

During college I was involved in the faculty's moot-court team. After the first two years, I realized that the regeneration of seniors did not inherit an efficient training scheme. Acknowledging this, I teamed up with two of my best friends and implemented a new creative method. We mind-mapped the recruitment, pleadings writings, and oral training processes. We started the recruitment process earlier and made a syllabus to be taught to the Moot Court Team. We held intensive yet flexible study groups outside of class to teach and learn together, closing the gap between different graduate of students. This small success is appreciated by the lecturers and the next generations, becoming a trademark training scheme for the moot-court team.

There are four essences to authenticity: Realistic, Empathy, openness, and trustworthiness. Realistically, not many students at my campus had interest in international law. Due to the lack of experts and an absence of academic platform. Understanding this situation, I empathized with one of my best friend and opened up our ideas to establish a study center focusing on International Law and shared it with the faculty. With a team of three including our lecturer, we trusted each other to establish; Base for International Law and ASEAN Legal Studies (BILALS). This is a major milestone for the campus, being the first study center to focus on International Law and ASEAN studies to accommodate future international law legal scholars.

Conclusively, my root of leadership is routed on an influential academic path, drawn on a blueprint of adaptability, creativity, and authenticity. By becoming a part of Chevening, I am convinced that it will open up the meadow of endless leadership and influential values to be harvested from academics, professionals, and practitioners. Altogether will be an investment for myself, my University, and my Country.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15384  
Nov 2, 2018   #2
Haekal, this essay takes too long to get to the point and when it does, the point is irrelevant to the prompt requirements. The reviewer is not interested in your life story so you can remove the first 2 paragraphs of your essay that references what it was like growing up for you. Your teach position does not show any real leadership nor influencing skills as there is no reference to that in the presentation. As a teacher you teach lessons, you do not impart leadership. Visualization exercises cannot be misrepresented as influencing skills either.

The college activity has potential but it appears that you did not need to lead the team but rather, work with others to accomplish tasks. Therefore, you were more of a team member rather than a team leader. You need to better develop your role as a leader and influencer in that aspect of your college extra curricular participation. That is the only part of this essay that shows some leadership and influencing potential of note. Any chance that you have a better leadership and influencing experience on a professional level to show how your leadership and influencing skills have improved since your college days?

Please do not treat the Chevening essay as a class lecture. That is how the majority of your discussion is represented. You appear to be talking down to the reviewer, which will be a direct insult to his intelligence and capacity to review your qualifications as a potential Chevening scholar. Don't tell him how to do his job. Just present strong examples of your leadership and influencing style. That is the main focus of this essay and that is what should be strongly seen when he reads your work.


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