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Lunch with Audrey Hepburn + Economics - UCLA scholarship



snow753 1 / -  
Feb 15, 2011   #1
This is for UCLA Scholarship..I'm so desperate right now, this is due in app. 5 hrs!!
I feel so bad for procrastinating, but someone PLEASE revise my drafts?
These have to be 500 words maximum. THANK YOU IN ADVANCE!

If you could have lunch with any famous person, either living or dead, whom would you choose and why? Describe your conversation at lunch.

As an influential style icon of the 20th century, Audrey Hepburn would be the person I would want to have lunch with to converse about how she came to live her extraordinary life. I believe there is a lot to be learned from her. Even today, she is still recognized as a powerful young actress and also one of the greatest inspiration for many young women, like me. As I read a book of her, I came to realize her pure and elegant lifestyle as an actress, mother, and a UNICEF president. Specifically, I want to ask her about the arduous steps she took as a young woman to accomplish her goals of becoming successful - not only in career, but also in choices she made, relationships, and motherhood, all of which I consider to be important for me in the future.

Audrey would start talking about how she had struggled through many difficulties in her life when she was young, but she was able to overcome all of them and achieve her goals with great zeal. As a child, Audrey was challenged with her parent's divorce and sufferings of war and as she came to poverty, she had to give up her dream of becoming a ballerina. Despite those troublesome times, she succeeds as a charismatic musical and Hollywood star with tenacity. She would tell me proudly that she practiced dancing for 16 hours everyday to make a movie. She was not a naturally talented actress; her concentration on hard work and her love for making films drove her to the top. "My own life has been much more than a fairy tale. I've had my share of difficult moments, but whatever difficulties I've gone through, I've always gotten a prize at the end," she would say. Hearing this story, I would think once again that a star cannot exist without endeavor and sincerity. I would ask her how she had managed to patient with her work and share how, like her, I strive to be a hard-working, ambitious individual to achieve my future goals.

Audrey certainly knew how to enjoy life and love herself with confidence. It would not be an exaggeration to say that she was one of the most successful actresses in the 20th century. With great morals and manners for living a worthwhile life, Audrey would be the perfect person to have conversation with and seek advice from.

Reflecting on your personal experiences or circumstances, tell us something about yourself not already or sufficiently communicated in your scholarship application that distinguishes you as a scholarship candidate.

In our complex world, business practices are constantly evolving and new technologies emerging; to understand these dynamics, and make a contribution, I plan to study Economics at UCLA. With an education in Economics, I would be equipped with the knowledge to contribute to the next set of creative solutions for healing our economy.

The economic recession directly affects students like me by jeopardizing much-needed educational opportunities. My school district was recently forced to lay off a large number of employees, both in and out of the classroom. This reduction means that students may face increased class size and limited course selections. Such economic crises underscore the seriousness of the recession, which is happening not only in the U.S, but all over the world. In South Korea, for instance, economic recession has resulted in a devalued currency. This has made it more difficult for my father, who works in Korea, to support my family here in the U.S. These issues have inspired me to study economics and develop the analytical and research skills that I will need to understand national and international problems within a global context.

Although every college would be a new experience in its own way, University of California would be an ideal environment in which to pursue my academic interests and develop my abilities. UCLA's devotion to a diverse community is admirable, and it will undoubtedly enrich my college years. I would love to contribute to this diversity. As seen in the recent WikiLeaks debacle, the issues we face in America are global problems. UCLA's diversity will not only broaden my understanding of the world and its inner workings, but it will also equip me to solve such global problems. Experiencing different perspectives and ideas will serve as a cornerstone for the success of its students as the next generation of global leaders. I can already sense the intense atmosphere created by UCLA students' drive to achieve. Learning from UCLA's highly respected professors and studying with its motivated students will open doors to great research and internship opportunities, which will ultimately allow me to delve more deeply into economics. Only then will I be prepared to face the world as an independent adult who is ready to pursue a meaningful career and be a contributor to better our economy in the future.

dolly 12 / 32  
Feb 15, 2011   #2
to converse about how did she live her life ,which was so extraordinary..Even today, she is still recognized as adept and dexterous young actress and also as one of the greatest inspiration for many young women, like me. As I read a book of her, I came to realize her pure and elegant lifestyle as an actress, mother, and a UNICEF president.

you can also use her prim and poised lifestyle...( if you like to..no compulsion) as an actress, mother and a UNICEF president.
not only in career, but also in the choices she made in her personal life all which are , I consider, to be important for every youngster.

Audrey would start talking about ...this is I feel a bit awkward.You can write I would I like her to tell me about how she confronted the difficulties that came in her life and inspite of all of these difficulties she acheived her goals witha great zeal.

Despite of , having troublesome times, she succeeded as a charismatic musical and Hollywood star with tenacity.
I think there is this problem that you are not writing what you would ask her instead of that you are just mentioning yourself the known facts about her. In my opinion you should try to use these facts to frame the questions you would like her while having lunch with her.

This is just a personal opinion, a very few grammatical errors are there..good luck!!!
dolly 12 / 32  
Feb 15, 2011   #3
In the other essay , grammar is almost correct. If you better better words and sentences then I can help you.
In this ever progressing or advancing world...why complex..??

With an education in Economics, I would be equipped with the knowledge to contribute to the next set of creative solutions for healing our economy. ( Education in economics can help me in the containment of knowledge that can aid in ameliorating the present economical state.

The economic recessions have world -wide detrimental effects (here this south korea example) . These pernicious effects affects our educational systems too, thus jeopardizing much needed educational opportunities .( then here you can give the example of your school).

University of California would be an ideal environment to further my academic studies and foster my abilities.
UCLA,s altruistic devotion towards...
I would love to contribute to this diversity( I too am eager to contribute to this devotion made by the University.
EF_Susan - / 2310  
Feb 23, 2011   #4
The conversation with Audrey Hepburn is a great idea. Can you connect it to your plans and goals? For example, how does someone with your career interest think about her accomplishments. See if you can incorporate your academic and career goals.

contribute to the next set of creative solutions for healing our economy.

Good! Can you be more specific? Give a little detail here about your main theme. That is all the reader will remember.
I really like that second essay, though, Helen. Great writing, there...
You need one poignant theme... a little more defined than just healing the economy... andexpress it at both the beginning and end. :-)


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