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An opportunity to study in China - Schwarzman scholarship essay



Javeria123 1 / -  
Aug 31, 2024   #1
Tell us about your professional/academic interests and goals as you see them now. Describe what particular social, cultural, business, policy, or global issue is the current focus of your motivation. Why and how did you develop an interest in this issue, and why do you think that interest might continue in the future

I am excited about the opportunity to study in China, where I can gain valuable insights from the country's advancements and contribute to the global dialogue on development. Building on my strong interest in psychology and hands-on experience academically, I aim to pursue an interdisciplinary degree and get specialized training to understand the broader social, economic, and political factors that impact mental health. This experience will contribute to my short-term goal of working as a clinical psychologist or research associate to address healthcare gaps while building connections with experts in the field and integrating these insights into practical treatment approaches. This background will support my current professional goal of developing trauma-informed care strategies and advanced therapeutic interventions, inspiring me to contribute to global mental health policies with organizations like the WHO, thus supporting the UN's Sustainable Development Goal 3 to enhance good health and well-being in the long run.
A healthy nation is the bedrock of a prosperous country, as the well-being of its citizen's affects social stability and overall development. However, despite its clear importance, it often remains ignored or stigmatized in many societies. On average, less than 2% of national healthcare budgets are allocated for mental health spending (Health, 2021). In comparison with the somatic healthcare system, there is a significant gap in unmet mental health needs in most countries globally, regardless of the economic status of any specific country. Additionally, current practices focus on individual treatment rather than preventive and population-wide solutions, creating gaps in care and inadequate support. Furthermore, Social exclusion from stigma worsens recovery outcomes and reduces quality of life and it also devalues mental health professions, exacerbating the shortage of practitioners. My interest in this issue developed through several key experiences. During my internship at PIMS Hospital, I worked with patients struggling with severe psychological issues, like sexual abuse and depression, and observed the difficulties faced within the Psychiatry department. A significant concern was the shortage of staff, with a single doctor often managing an overwhelming number of patients, leading to inadequate care and negatively affected patients' well-being. Discussions with hospital administration revealed a severe lack of resources and limited treatment capacity. Additionally, Volunteering with trauma survivor organizations further exposed me to significant barriers in accessing in my future leadership role, I aim to focus on these critical gaps to drive improvements in mental health outcomes and workforce development with China's involvement being crucial in this global effort.
There isn't a single factor contributing to this issue; it arises from a complex mix of individual factors like gender and ethnicity, environmental events such as natural disasters and conflicts, and economic factors like income security. I firmly believe that my commitment to the issue will likely to continue as there is a clear and rising demand for improved access to high quality mental health services. for instance, as stated in U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics "From 2022 to 2032, employment in mental health-related occupations is expected to grow faster than the 3% average for all jobs" Additionally the rise in geopolitical turmoil, including ongoing wars and climate change, has led to increased rates of Trauma, depression, and anxiety, as a result trained clinicians and community liaisons are required to avoid doing more harm than good.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15384  
Sep 1, 2024   #2
This is a combined personal statement and motivation letter. As such, it should focus on your personal insights and highlight the foundation of your interests. It should not contain any research references and in-text citations. The paper does not come across as open and insightful. It feels mechanical in terms of provided information and does not contain any highlights that could be considered a game changer for your application. I am not sure if you are using this for an undergraduate or masters degree application so I am unable to advise you regarding the proper target information and experiences that could help you improve this paper. What I can advise you is to remove the reference to your interest in studying in China at the start. That does not serve a purpose and does not tie in with the writing information requirements.


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