Hi all,
I'm looking for some peer review on my essay below. The prompt is directly below this. Any advice is welcome! Thank you in advance.
From a young age I have had the opportunity to experience many different cultures. As the son of an Arab immigrant mother and a Caucasian Catholic father, the last place anyone would expect me to attend pre-school and, later on, after school care was at the Jewish Community Center. Fortunately, my parents never believed in using religion or ethnicity as criteria for choosing whom to associate with. Rather, they embraced every opportunity to expose me to various cultures.
Although I was too young to fully grasp the situation, I noticed early in my experience at the Jewish Community Center that I was different than the other kids. Whereas everyone else already knew of traditional celebrations of Shabbat, Hanukkah, Passover and other Jewish holidays, the JCC was the first and only place I experienced this.
As I grew older, I began to understand the situation. Because I had been around the Jewish community from a young age, I had a head start on integrating myself into their culture. I became aware of the fact that keeping the trust of those around you, especially in situations where two cultures meet, is of the upmost importance in developing relationships. It was around this time that I was left out of a celebration for the first time. During one Passover Seder, I was asked to stay back and not participate. At the time, I felt like an outsider. For days I begged my mother to let me go to a different after-school program. Luckily, she held strong and kept me at the JCC. This taught me to respect other cultures, even if doing so makes me feel like I'm being left out. It brought to light that traditions of this sort are about the people that celebrate them, not me.
More recently, I came to one of the most diverse places imaginable: Arizona State University. As one of the largest universities in the US with 70,000 students, it goes without saying that I've met people from all different backgrounds. It was a huge challenge for me to get out of my "bubble" and experience people that I wouldn't have back in my home state of Kansas. In doing so, I have developed close relationships with students from Turkey, England, Mexico and Bulgaria. These relationships have taught me that we should celebrate our differences, not act as though they don't exist.
My experiences have given me the open-mindedness to immerse myself in my home country's culture while have the awareness to respect traditions. I know that no matter where I'm placed, I will meet and exceed the fourth Core Expectation.
I'm looking for some peer review on my essay below. The prompt is directly below this. Any advice is welcome! Thank you in advance.
International Students
From a young age I have had the opportunity to experience many different cultures. As the son of an Arab immigrant mother and a Caucasian Catholic father, the last place anyone would expect me to attend pre-school and, later on, after school care was at the Jewish Community Center. Fortunately, my parents never believed in using religion or ethnicity as criteria for choosing whom to associate with. Rather, they embraced every opportunity to expose me to various cultures.
Although I was too young to fully grasp the situation, I noticed early in my experience at the Jewish Community Center that I was different than the other kids. Whereas everyone else already knew of traditional celebrations of Shabbat, Hanukkah, Passover and other Jewish holidays, the JCC was the first and only place I experienced this.
As I grew older, I began to understand the situation. Because I had been around the Jewish community from a young age, I had a head start on integrating myself into their culture. I became aware of the fact that keeping the trust of those around you, especially in situations where two cultures meet, is of the upmost importance in developing relationships. It was around this time that I was left out of a celebration for the first time. During one Passover Seder, I was asked to stay back and not participate. At the time, I felt like an outsider. For days I begged my mother to let me go to a different after-school program. Luckily, she held strong and kept me at the JCC. This taught me to respect other cultures, even if doing so makes me feel like I'm being left out. It brought to light that traditions of this sort are about the people that celebrate them, not me.
More recently, I came to one of the most diverse places imaginable: Arizona State University. As one of the largest universities in the US with 70,000 students, it goes without saying that I've met people from all different backgrounds. It was a huge challenge for me to get out of my "bubble" and experience people that I wouldn't have back in my home state of Kansas. In doing so, I have developed close relationships with students from Turkey, England, Mexico and Bulgaria. These relationships have taught me that we should celebrate our differences, not act as though they don't exist.
My experiences have given me the open-mindedness to immerse myself in my home country's culture while have the awareness to respect traditions. I know that no matter where I'm placed, I will meet and exceed the fourth Core Expectation.
