Question about Study Plan to improve foreign language for GKS undergraduate. Review needed.

language study plan

I need your precious feedback on this language study plan for GKS undergraduate. I made it small as I my Study Plan B would be long and I have a limit of 3 pages only. Can I also add headings like BEFORE and AFTER?

Study plans to improve foreign languages(Korean, English, etc) required for taking a bachelor's degree course BEFORE and AFTER you come to Korea

My second language is English and was able in it since elementary school. I watch many English movies and animations and try to take up a new vocabulary. I again apply unknown words in regular activities. I started preparing for my IELTS test two months ago for a great grip on the language. I prepared every section of Reading, Listening, Writing, and Speaking with much dedication. I got Band 7 in IELTS. Before leaving for Korea, I will still continue working more. Now for Korean, I can add that it's my third language. I am learning Korean for two years. I can pick out the conversations. I am advancing Korean by following Courses online, Reading Articles, Blogs, Newspapers, and checking out Korean Vlogs. I too listen to K-pop and see K-dramas without subtitles to grasp native speaking styles. I communicate with my Korean friends and ask questions about Korean.

After entering Korea, my priority is to adapt to the surroundings to study Korean fast. This is mandatory for my bachelor's course. I promise to spend less time completing my language course. Korean is my sheer joy. Besides, I will likewise seek to talk to my Korean allies in Korean for speedy understanding. I will check out News, TV programs, and refer to the Publications in Korean to be productive. English again demands further studying. I will carry on expanding my knowledge by viewing English shows, Broadcasts, Vlogs, reviewing Papers, and Journals. English is my medium for studying Korean, so I have to create it strong enough. Anyhow, a person keeps on learning until the grave. I consider both languages are vast. I will go on receiving different points throughout my life to strengthen them.

Thank you for your time

@ghufran839 I liked that you gave a lot of examples of what you do to improve both languages, however, it sounds a little bit choppy, try to expand a little more your description and give a nice conclusion to each sentence. Also, show how you will continue to develop your English skills in Korea, and try to show what resources you will use at your college to improve both languages.

And as you asked, I don't think it is a good idea to add headings like "BEFORE and AFTER", try to keep the text in an essay format.

You need professional help with your essay. Your grammar will not convince the reviewer that you truly got a band 7 score in the IELTS test. Your work requires editing in English. The way you express yourself in English is still in a transliterate manner so do not brag too highly about your English language skills. It is nothing to brag about. If you want to comes across as a fluent English speaker, writer, and thinker, then hire a professional to clean up your presentation. Right now, you definitely come across as an ESL who is still learning the English language, with only elementary English language skills.

As for your Hangul skills, you should not be claiming it as a 3rd language yet. There is no proof of your TOPIK proficiency, which is the only evidence the Korean reviewer will need to consider you a skilled Hangul speaker. You may want to rethink the first part of your language proficiency claims. You are too boastful, with the evidence of your writing showing you to be otherwise. The reviewer will consider these false and unsubstantiated claims, which could very well result in your application being rejected.

@Holt
Your feedback is very helpful. Did I sound like boasting? I really didn't intend to do that, I just wanted to show my learning. And for Hangul, I would attach a print of online TOPIK so I didn't mention it here. Further, can I add names of some series I watched in 1sr paragraph?