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I have used networking to promote and advance peer-to-peer learning. Scholarship writing

Chaarvi 2 / 5 1  
Oct 29, 2017   #1
Hi all, came across this forum just a few days ago. It will be very helpful if you all can review my networking essay for the Chevening Scholarship and give me some feedback!

Thanks in advance.

Networking Essay for Chevening

I have used networking to promote and advance peer-to-peer learning. During the YIF, I viewed every interaction as an opportunity to learn from peers, professors, and alumni. My biggest learning about social enterprises and business models came from Deep Kalra, CEO of MakeMyTrip who I met at an informal breakfast gathering. At that time, I was building Karmaara, my social enterprise at the intersection of handicrafts, skill building and livelihoods. Mr. Kalra, drawing from his interest in skills training and job creation, explained the importance of scalability and replicability of a business model to ensure higher success and impact. This helped me focus my thinking and ideate on a robust, well-rounded model for Karmaara, and is a lesson I use today while evaluating social enterprises applying to Villgro's incubation programs. Such peer-to-peer learning will be amplified through interactions with fellow Chevening scholars, given the focus of bringing together students from a variety of departments and universities. I envision long and fruitful interactions with fellow scholars to gain learnings I can tangibly apply to my work post my course.

Additionally, networking has helped me build connections that enable me grow professionally and personally by initiating long-lasting and prosperous relationships. At Villgro, I was chosen to design a special program, the Technical Assistance Pool, to create a network of service providers and resources from Legal, Finance, to Product Design and Patent Licensing to assist Villgro's portfolio companies. I actively solicited recommendations for such service provides from entrepreneurs, peers, mentors, and leaders in this field, conducted an active due diligence on these recommendations and engaged with appropriate providers to build an active Technical Assistance Pool network. In less than a year, I had signed on 15 such partners. These partners have gone on to work with 25 of Villgro's portfolio companies since. Forging strong relationships within the Chevening Scholars' community will not only expand my own base of knowledge but also allow me to better support the young businesses I will work with by enabling me to connect them with the right mentors and networks to scale their businesses.

And finally, giving back is crucial to keep the networking cycle alive. I was recently chosen to participate in the Tamil Nadu Young Thinkers' Forum 2017, an independent association of youth committed to the betterment of the social and economic ecosystem of Tamil Nadu and India. Through this forum, I interacted with several youths working on innovative solutions to counter poverty in Tamil Nadu. I was approached by a Senior Bureaucrat in Goa's Cabinet to help him draft a special social entrepreneurship policy for Goa, given my experience with social enterprises and impact. Giving time outside of my work, I co-created the first draft of this idea with the officer and enabled him to build a strong, mature policy to present to his cabinet. I look forward to collaborating and assisting my fellow Chevening Scholars to enable them to give the best to their work and personal lives.
ele_ol 2 / 4  
Oct 29, 2017   #2
"Forging strong relationships within the Chevening ..."
this sentence seems too long.
And maybe you should clarify what "YIF" is?
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,669 4754  
Oct 30, 2017   #3
Chaarvi, your last 2 paragraphs are perfect for the networking essay. It is really clear about how you came across, developed, and continue to value the networks you have created. I strongly urge you to use these last 2 paragraphs for your overall networking presentation without any edits. The first paragraph speaks more of a learning experience than a networking experience. Also, you make specific mention of a person in that paragraph. Normally, it is best to mention organizations but not people connected with it because the expectation will be that the person you mentioned will write you a recommendation letter to accompany your essay. If you will not be able to attach his recommendation letter, it would be best to not mention this part anymore. If you want to mention it though, then remove the name of the person (change it to the organization name) and make it sound more like a networking event rather than a learning experience.
OP Chaarvi 2 / 5 1  
Oct 30, 2017   #4
Hi, thanks so much for the valuable feedback. It didn't occur to me that that is how it is viewed when we name a person in an essay. Very useful tip. I will edit the first paragraph accordingly. Maybe I will move it to the end, to ensure that the impact of the other two paragraphs isn't diluted!

Thanks so much again :)
OP Chaarvi 2 / 5 1  
Oct 30, 2017   #5
Thanks for the feedback!

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