How to write an appeal for scholarship to a college board. Include strong points and remedies

appeal the loss of my scholarship

Hello everyone, below is a letter of appeal that I would love to send to the board at my school. I appreciate your input ans constructive criticism !

Thank you !

Dear Provost Committee,
I write this letter to appeal the loss of my scholarship due to my inability to meet the required minimum criteria for retainment. I am aware that the criteria to retain a scholarship is a cumulative grade point average of 3.0 after two semesters. I reckon that my cumulative grade point average for the two semesters - fall 2018 and spring 2019 is 2.64 which is below the minimum academic average. While I take full responsibility for this, I would greatly appreciate it if the committee would consider the circumstances that contributed to the drop in my GPA.

As reflected by my grade point average in the fall semester, I was a howling success. I owe this to the fact that my sole responsibility in the fall semester was my academics and I was void of any external interference. However, by the spring semester, I had acquired a job with Student Access Services on campus which affected my academics unknowingly. I imagined I would be able to cope because I had a flexible schedule, but I was wrong. The crux of my problem lay in planning and delegating hours for work and other activities. Prior to that job, I had never dealt with the obligation of handling two responsibilities - work and academic. I was thrown off my game.

In retrospect, I realize that although there is no wrong in taking up another obligation, it should not affect the main commitment which is my academics and in cases like this where it does, critical steps like a leave or resignation are in order. Following this experience, I have learned from my mistakes and I am determined to make the most of this opportunity, should I be given a second chance, to prove myself and exceed the minimum requirements to retain the scholarship. I have been offered a position to work with RSR for the fall and scheduled my work hours such that it doesn't affect my academics. With this in place, you can be assured that such incidents like this will never repeat itself.

Regardless of the final decision, I am utterly grateful for the support and generosity in offering me this scholarship in the first place and I apologize in advance to the numerous people and organizations I have let down through this incident. I only ask that the committee consider my plea and allow me one semester to bring my GPA back up and above the required minimum.

Thank you for taking time out to consider my appeal.

@zagger_dat
Hi there!

I'll do my best to provide you with feedback on your writing.

First and foremost, I find that your writing is well put-together. You were articulate with acknowledging what had gone wrong throughout your stay (and hence why you have lost the scholarship). And yet, you were also clear that you wanted to take responsibility for the consequences of what had happened. I find this to be a courageous approach to the situation, enabling you to relay that you are mature enough to handle it.

I would suggest that you try to extend the arguments that you had regarding your acquisition of the job opportunity at the Student Access Services. If you can do this, you'll be able to fortify the reason and rationale as to why you have chosen to partake this field. What were the reasons as to why you had needed to take up an additional job? If you can discuss this - even with personal details incorporated - you'll be able to strengthen that this was not a decision that you had made on a whim.

Other than this, I suggest revising the logical and grammatical composition and structure of your second to the last paragraph. Some sentences in the initial parts of the sentence were a bit confusing regards to what specifically you had meant by them. Doing this would help you become more articulate.

Best of luck as always! I hope the best for your appeal letter.