"Art and Reality as Paint Strokes " - School of Visual Arts - SVA - Statement of Intent

I was wondering if you could help me with some advises and correcting my statement of intent. Sorry for my English by the way.

"Art is everything" is something that I have heard since I have memory, but without obtaining more than repetitive and vague explanations followed after that statement.

My curiosity for analyzing and trying to understand every little piece of everything, was also something that has accompanied me since I have memory; eventually leading me to question the "Art is everything statement" at an early age. The multiple questions and its ramifications (Situation that I always find myself after questioning something) that I ended with, were the results of my intent to find an answer to the why of a global statement. The situation that I always find myself after questioning something, my tacit passion about art, and eagerness for find new perspectives, entailed me to connect everything in an abstract concept.

Art is relative, depends on the perspectives established by differents circumstances. These perspectives and the ability to observe through them, leads to art creation and comprehension, as human unification and comprehension; all this resulting in an infinite cycle unifying perspectives through art and art through perspectives, where everything we see and our individual reality is formed by perspectives, as a paint stroke on a canvas, where an array of strokes of paint create an image with its individual range of colors and shapes. That is the reason why I am so passionate about art and new perspectives exploring, because connects everything.

A year and a half ago, while I was visiting my father, I made the decision to stay here to pursue my passion and goals. I have already lived in another continent, specifically Europe, and without any doubt was an enriching experience. So, two years after I returned to my returned to my beautifully chaotic and grey sky city, I ended here finding a new place to explore and looking for new perspectives. In this year and a half, I achieved to get a decent GPA as an ESL student, and gained experience in the educational system. As I'm looking for new perspectives to learn from them, I am looking forward to be a student of the School of Visual Arts in New York, which I consider is a place full of movement with a great artistic and professional environment.

Specialization in game arts, 3D computer animation, narrative and story development are some of the things that offer the Computer Art, Computer Animation & Visual arts major, but are also some of the things that I'm highly enthused about. Pursuing a Computer Art Major will lead me to be able to use and control the technology as a tool to connect to art and go further the story-telling of art experience. Furthermore leading me to be able to create and share perspectives to the world, something that I yearn deeply since I was a child, and with a Computer Art Major of the SVA would give me the opportunity to develop professionally in my passion.

Your essay delivers a lot of information but does not really explain your passion behind your love of arts. What is the driving force that has led you to pursue Arts a major? Why do you wish to explore the statement that 'Art is everything"? How do you plan on pursuing a personal discovery / answer to that question based upon the study of art? Your intentions / motivations for pursuing an Art degree is not as clear as it should be. You are going for an abstract explanation, obviously trying to impress the reviewer, when what you should be doing is offering a straightforward explanation as to why you wish to major in Arts.

There is no need to mention that you moved to be with your father a year and a half ago. There is no place in this essay response for an academic discussion or mention of your academic preparedness for college. That does not have a direct relation to your intent and just changes the topic of the essay needlessly.

Further review of your essay has shown me that there is a semblance of intent in your closing paragraph. Your paper would work better if you developed that paragraph as your opening statement instead. Then, you can remove the part about moving to be with your dad. With that adjustment, the essay just might finally work as a draft statement of intent for you. Review the paper, re-position some paragraphs and sentences, see if it leads you to a better version of this first work.