Why did I choose UCF (Electrical & Computer Science program)

I chose to apply to the University of Central Florida because of its Electrical & Computer Science program and it's proximity to home. The outstanding UCF Division I athletics also attracted me to apply because of its exciting and competitive program. With me being the strong and die-hearted sports fan that I am, I'm going to need a strong and competitive sports program to cheer on. I have competed in several sports like track, basketball, and my most favorite football. During my last two years in high school, I helped lead my team to the second round in the playoffs, as one of the starting wide receivers. The University of Central Florida offers many complimentary facilities to keep their students physically fit like a large recreational complex, and an Indoor track. With my major being computer engineering, the school of Electrical Engineering & Computer Science provides numerous of opportunities in education, research and providing undergraduate and advanced degrees in the renaissance careers of the future. Being that the University of Central Florida is located in Orlando, it's only about three to four hours away from my family which is a more convenient trip for my family members to visit. With the major companies offering cooperative education and internships to UCF's engineering students it helps make internships opportunities for summer employment and future job opportunities

not really interesting! hmm
The outstanding UCF Division I athletics also attracted me to apply because of its exciting and competitive program. With me being the strong and die-hearted sports fan that I am, I'm going to need a strong and competitive sports program to cheer on. I have competed in several sports like track, basketball, and my most favorite football . During my last two years in high school, I helped lead my team to the second round in the playoffs, as one of the starting wide receivers (make no sense)

your essay is generally okay, but actually I must confess that I don't like it much, you should focus on 1 thing to make your essay more impressive

good luck! hope my opinion useful

The essay suffers from the fact that you have simply listed all of the reasons you want to attend the university, without bothering to tie them together in any way.

Also, as it is currently written, the essay doesn't really contain any strong reasons for why you chose UCF.

For instance, you say you are a die hard sports fan, but instead of talking about which teams at UCF you would like to join, and what makes UCF teams so much better than their rivals, you merely say that "the University of Central Florida offers many complimentary facilities to keep their students physically fit like a large recreational complex, and an Indoor track." Well, so what? Most universities have a gym of some sort. Many even have tracks.

You also say that "With my major being computer engineering, the school of Electrical Engineering & Computer Science provides numerous of opportunities in education, research and providing undergraduate and advanced degrees in the renaissance careers of the future." You could say this about any university and any degree program. This makes it a poor reason for attending UCF.

Everything after this is even more general and could easily be omitted. To strengthen your essay, do some research on UCF. Find out what UCF is particularly proud of, how it markets its computer science dept, etc., and then come up with reasons for wanting to attend UCF that map on to those things.

Good luck.

Being the strong and die hard sports fan that I am, I'm going to need a strong and competitive sports program to cheer on.

I have competed in several sports like track, basketball, and my most favorite, football.

The University of Central Florida is located in Orlando, and it's only about three to four hours away from my family which is a more convenient trip for my family members to visit.

With the major companies offering cooperative education and internships to UCF's engineering students it helps make internships opportunities for summer employment and future job opportunities.

I think your essay would sound better if you wrote about academics first, and sports later.

:)