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UC undergraduate prompt #1 where do I come from?



k8255 3 / 3  
Nov 23, 2009   #1
Hello guys!

I have written my essay for UC and i need critiques!

Thank you!

Since my early childhood, an unavoidable aspect of my life was frequent moving not only around Korea but also around the world. Moving to different places has offered me the opportunity to meet various types of people and cultures that I had not been exposed to. Such experiences provided me with precious memories and at the same time, they have also challenged me with obstacles that I had difficult time coping with. This cycle of moving to different places and getting adjusted has shaped me and granted me some of the characteristics that would well describe me as a person: openness to cultural differences, adaptability, and independence.

One of the major effects that moving around places had on me was witnessing different cultures. When I first moved to India, I was somewhat astonished with the fact that most Indians do not consume beef. This just did not make any sense to me at first since I was a fervent lover of beef. I would meditate upon the reason behind such cultural differences. It was because the Hindu religion, which is the major religion in the country of India, worships cows as gods. Such habit of pondering upon various cultural gaps allowed me to become a person who is open-minded. Furthermore, I came to truly appreciate the differences and how different people comprehend each other's varying attributes.

Another impact that resulted from frequent moving was the development of great adaptability. From first grade year to my high school senior year, I have attended six different schools moving four times. As a result, I had to adapt myself to completely new circumstances every time I moved. I would often discover myself sitting in a new classroom with new people. With such frequent moves, I had to develop a special skill of fitting myself into new environments. My quality of being extraordinarily flexible granted me to these days, the ability to cope with different situations with little or no predicaments.

Adjusting to new environments has not only rendered me into a flexible and open individual, but it has also made me be independent. Most of the times, with almost no one to offer me a helping hand, I was solely by myself in different situations. Since English was not my mother tongue, I had a very challenging time when I was first picking it up. When I was enrolled in American International School-Chennai in India, due to the fact that I had no person around me who was fluent in both Korean and English, I had to teach myself English. At first, it seemed like an insurmountable hardship. Yet, as days passed, I soon became friends with the language. This experience has made me aware I could actually accomplish something on my own if I had a clear goal in my mind.

Frequent moving has offered me with some of the most challenging hardships and also some of the most beautiful times of my life. However, the greatest gifts that I received from moving were my quality of openness to differences, adaptability and independence. With these invaluable attributes, I greatly look forward in going beyond my limitations and challenge myself with higher level thinking.

Michelle 1 / 3  
Nov 24, 2009   #2
Since my early childhood, an unavoidable aspect of my life was not only frequently moving (I suggest moving those words around a little for a better flow) around Korea but also around the world.

experience cultures that I would not have otherwise been exposed to.

Those experiences provided me with precious memories but at the same time, they have also challenged me with obstacles that I have had a difficult time coping with.

(The constant) cycle of moving to different places and getting adjusted has shaped who I am and given me some of the characteristics that would well describe me as a person: openness to cultural differences, adaptability, and independence.

One of the major effects that moving around places had on me was witnessing different cultures. When I first moved to India, I was somewhat astonished with the fact that most Indians don't consume beef. At first this just didn't make any sense to me, atfirst since I was (am, if you still are) a fervent lover of beef. I would meditate /(ponder) upon the reason behind such a major cultural difference. It was because the Hindu religion, which is the major religion in the country of India. They worships cows as gods. SuchMy habit of pondering upon various cultural gaps allowed me to become an open-minded person who is open-minded . Furthermore, I came to truly appreciate the differences among people and to appreciate how different(ly) people comprehend each other's varying attributes.

Another impact that resulted from frequent moving was the development of great adaptability. From first grade year totill my senior year of high school senior year , I have attended six different schools, moving four times. As a result, I had to adapt myself to completely new circumstances every time I moved. I would often discover myself sitting in a new classroom with new people. With such frequent moves, I had to develop a special skill of fitting myself into new environments. My quality of being extraordinarily flexible granted me to these days, the ability to cope with different situations with little or no predicaments.

Adjusting to new environments has not only rendered me into a flexible and open individual, but it has also made me be independent. Most of the times , with almost no one to offer me a helping hand, I was solely by myself in different situations. Since English was not my mother tongueNative Language, I had a very challenging time when I was first picking it up. When I was enrolled in American International School-Chennai in India, due to the fact that I had nooneperson around me who was fluent in both Korean and English, I had to teach myself English. At first, it seemed like an insurmountable hardship. Yet, as days passed, I soon became friends with the language. This experience has made me aware that I could actually accomplish something on my own if I had a clear goal in my mind.

Frequent moving has offered me with some of the most challenging hardships and also some of the most beautiful times of my life. However, the greatest gifts that I received from moving were my quality of openness to differences, adaptability, and independence. With these invaluable attributes, I greatly look forward in going beyond my limitations and challenge myself with higher level thinking.

Overall I really enjoyed your essay I hope this imput helps you. I'm especially impressed with it since English isn't your native language.
OP k8255 3 / 3  
Nov 24, 2009   #3
I really appreciate your comments!

Thank you!


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