I wrote this essay a bit uninspired. Please critique it as harshly as you can...
Prompt: Describe your intellectual interests, their evolution, and what makes them exciting to you. Tell us how you will utilize the academic programs in the College of Arts and Sciences to further explore your interests, intended major, or field of study.
History is commonly perceived to be a study of dead things. Dead People, Dead Civilizations, Dead ideologies. The list can go endlessly. For me, however, there was something ensnaring about history. It was the one class I just couldn't wait for, whether it be 4th grade or 4th period in high school. History gave me something to think about because every lesson had a parallel in the real world. Almost automatically I was drawn towards history's unconventional answers, answers that rejected the obvious and searched for the intertwined and intangible truths.
In fourth grade, I was the kid who loved history class because it like story time, except with tests. But, what grabbed my attention was the teacher's fantastic stories of the Civil War especially his stories President Lincoln's Emancipation Proclamation. A document my teacher heralded as a sign of Lincoln's hatred of slavery. One day in class, my hand shot up. I asked the teacher "Why did President Lincoln want to free the slaves?" He stared at me quizzically "Um...I just answered that, slavery was bad and he wanted to get rid of it." "Then, why didn't he free them at the beginning of the war?" I responded. My history teacher stared blankly at me.
Years later, I came to recognize my search for the unconventional truth in history as a socially beneficial responsibility. As a student, I worked in the California New Born Screening Program; a program instituted to treat or prevent disorders is early childhood. Statistics in my lab revealed that Hispanic mothers and babies had a higher likelihood of refusing testing or simply ignoring protocol. What my superiors wrote off the occurrence as a cultural rift, the problem was something I could not ignore. In the twenties, President Herbert Hoover deported Hispanic individuals citing the same "cultural rift," but through my history teacher's instruction, I was certain that both Hoover and the lab had overlooked the simplest of problems-communication. A week after I suggested that Spanish translators be used, local clinics reported a rise in the number of Hispanic mothers accepting testing. The unconventional answer for history was thus transformed into a modern answer for medicine.
Cornell has always encouraged the unconventional answer and that is why I hope to study history at the university, but more importantly engage in the undergraduate research that Cornell augments its programs with. I would love to study the dynamics of race relations in the United States and the research opportunities that Cornell offer allow me to search for the unconventional answers I have dreamed of. But, better yet, Cornell provides me the ability to not just study, but implement what I have learned. I plan on taking full advantage of the "Cornell in Washington" program, so that I may work towards social responsibility by encouraging change in public policy.
History has never been dead for me. In fact, history can easily influence the future and I want to be part of the process, every step of the way.
Prompt: Describe your intellectual interests, their evolution, and what makes them exciting to you. Tell us how you will utilize the academic programs in the College of Arts and Sciences to further explore your interests, intended major, or field of study.
History is commonly perceived to be a study of dead things. Dead People, Dead Civilizations, Dead ideologies. The list can go endlessly. For me, however, there was something ensnaring about history. It was the one class I just couldn't wait for, whether it be 4th grade or 4th period in high school. History gave me something to think about because every lesson had a parallel in the real world. Almost automatically I was drawn towards history's unconventional answers, answers that rejected the obvious and searched for the intertwined and intangible truths.
In fourth grade, I was the kid who loved history class because it like story time, except with tests. But, what grabbed my attention was the teacher's fantastic stories of the Civil War especially his stories President Lincoln's Emancipation Proclamation. A document my teacher heralded as a sign of Lincoln's hatred of slavery. One day in class, my hand shot up. I asked the teacher "Why did President Lincoln want to free the slaves?" He stared at me quizzically "Um...I just answered that, slavery was bad and he wanted to get rid of it." "Then, why didn't he free them at the beginning of the war?" I responded. My history teacher stared blankly at me.
Years later, I came to recognize my search for the unconventional truth in history as a socially beneficial responsibility. As a student, I worked in the California New Born Screening Program; a program instituted to treat or prevent disorders is early childhood. Statistics in my lab revealed that Hispanic mothers and babies had a higher likelihood of refusing testing or simply ignoring protocol. What my superiors wrote off the occurrence as a cultural rift, the problem was something I could not ignore. In the twenties, President Herbert Hoover deported Hispanic individuals citing the same "cultural rift," but through my history teacher's instruction, I was certain that both Hoover and the lab had overlooked the simplest of problems-communication. A week after I suggested that Spanish translators be used, local clinics reported a rise in the number of Hispanic mothers accepting testing. The unconventional answer for history was thus transformed into a modern answer for medicine.
Cornell has always encouraged the unconventional answer and that is why I hope to study history at the university, but more importantly engage in the undergraduate research that Cornell augments its programs with. I would love to study the dynamics of race relations in the United States and the research opportunities that Cornell offer allow me to search for the unconventional answers I have dreamed of. But, better yet, Cornell provides me the ability to not just study, but implement what I have learned. I plan on taking full advantage of the "Cornell in Washington" program, so that I may work towards social responsibility by encouraging change in public policy.
History has never been dead for me. In fact, history can easily influence the future and I want to be part of the process, every step of the way.