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I am different; Where do i feel perfectly content



ilovejjlc 1 / -  
Oct 29, 2013   #1
Hello there . I am currently working on my college essay and my topic is . Where do i feel perfectly content. this is my essay so far and i am not stuck on my concluding paragraph. Help please? and any other tips and corrections and little helps are always appreciated. thank you :D here goes..

When a person is asked where he/she is perfectly content, the usual answer would be somewhere that is calm, quiet, and serene. However, I am different. When I am asked this question, my answer is when I am surround with children at Rainbowland Nursery/Preschool. To me, being perfectly content in my environment means more than a state of peacefulness; it is when I am at my happiest. I am surrounded with the laughter, tears, and voices of the children I love. No matter what corner I turn, I can easily distinguish the scent of dirty diapers, baby wipes, air fresheners, and crayons from each another. All around me, I see children of different sizes and ages interacting with friends and playing. The walls are hidden behind hand turkeys, Fruit loop necklaces, pictures, and cubbies that are filled up with the belonging of the children. With almost every child I see, I am greeted with the tightest hugs and the sloppiest kiss. For others this may sound like a nightmare, but it is here where I find myself perfectly content with life.

Growing up, my parents were not what you would consider very affectionate. When I was young my mother would walk me to school and drop me off at the door, but that was it. I never received the goodbye hugs and kisses my classmates would get and at times, I felt unloved. I now know that is far from the truth, but that is exactly what sparked my love for working with children. When working with children I am enveloped I this sense of a loving family environment. Hugs and kisses that were never present in my childhood were found here. Knowing how it hurt, I never again wanted any children to question their parents love for them. I set a goal to never let a child feel unloved or under appreciated.

Ever since I was young, I was always a sensitive person. After being bullied in fifth and sixth grade, I began to develop anxiety and paranoia issues. Since then, my situation never really got better or worse. Being wary and paranoid of everyone has become a daily struggle for me and occasionally I get my not so fun anxiety attacks. My anxiety attacks have at times been so nerve-wracking that I began searching for an escape. I have been quite unsuccessful until I began volunteering for my sophomore service. I knew I loved working with children, but I slowly realized while working with children I felt my anxiety levels decrease and I finally felt safe. Aside from giving me a sense of family, working with children at Rainbowland has also been my escape. There have been times where I was on the verge of having another episode, but the moment I started working with the children I could feel the fears and anxiety melt away.

justin11895 2 / 1  
Nov 1, 2013   #2
Heres my take

When a person is asked where he/she is perfectly content, the usual answer would be somewhere that is calm, quiet, and serene. However, I am different.When I am asked this question, my answer isW hen I am surroundedby children at Rainbowland Nursery/Preschool (Spell out fully, no slashes) . To me, being perfectly content in my environment means more thanI am in not only a state of peacefulness,but I am at my happiesttruly happy . I am surrounded withby the laughter, tears, and voices of the children I love. No matter what corner I turn, I can easily distinguish the scent of dirty diapers, baby wipes, air fresheners, and crayons from eachone another. All around me, I see children of different sizes and ages interacting with friends and playing together . The walls are hidden behind hand turkeys, Fruit loop necklaces, pictures, and cubbies that are filled up with the belongings of the children. With almost every child I see, I am greeted with the tightest hugs and the sloppiest kiss. To others this may sound like a nightmare, but it is here where I find myself perfectly content with life .

Growing up, my parents were not what you would consider very affectionate. When I was younger my mother would walk me to school and drop me off at the door, but that was it. I never received the goodbye hugs and kisses my classmates would receive and at times I felt unloved. I now know that is far from the truth, but that is exactly what sparked my love for working with children. When working with children I am enveloped in a loving family environment. Hugs and kisses that were never present in my childhood are found here. Knowing how much it hurt me , I never again wanted any children to question their parents love for them . I set a goal to never let a child feel unloved or under-appreciated.

Ever since I was young, I was alwaysI have always been a sensitive person. After being bullied in fifth and sixth grade, I began to develop anxiety and paranoia issues . Since then, my situation never really got better or worsehas remained indifferent . Being wary and paranoid of everyone has become a daily struggle for me and occasionally I get my not-so-fun anxiety attacks. My anxiety attacks have At times, they have been so nerve-wracking that I began searching for an escape. I have been quite unsuccessful until I began volunteering for my sophomore service. I knew I loved working with children, butand I am slowly realizing while working with children I felt my anxiety levels are decreasing and I finally am starting to feel safe. Aside from giving me a sense of family, working with children at Rainbowland has also been myserved as an escape. There have been times where I was on the verge of having another episode, but the moment I started working with the children I could feel the fears and anxiety melt away. Find a way to conclude it, bring it to a wrap
dumi 1 / 6793  
Nov 2, 2013   #3
When a person is asked where he/she is perfectly content, the usual answer would be somewhere that is calm, quiet, and serene.However, I am different. When I am asked this question, my answer is when I am surround with children at Rainbowland Nursery/Preschool. To me, being perfectly content in my environment means more than a state of peacefulness; it is when I am at my happiest.

.... Very good idea and it's a very logical explanation too. However, I like if you presented this with more simple sentences because I find some repetitions in this part. This is what I suggest;

For many people, the place that they can be perfectly content needs to be calm, quiet and serene. However, I am different and this place is the Rainbowland Nursery / Preschool where I get surrounded by many noisy kids. To me, it is not the state of peacefulness in mind that makes me contented. It is the place where I can fill myself with joy and happiness.


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