Elaborate on one extracurricular (Sound engineer)

Could you guys help me on my commonapp extra... response. Be as harsh as possible.

Sound check. Testing microphone... all systems functioning. My job as a sound engineer is simple; maintaining sound balance whenever the Protestant community in my school meets. I love music. Unfortunately my voice is nothing to write home about and though I play the guitar, you had better not be close when I am playing. So I took up sound engineering and though it was a late decision, the experience has been wonderful. I, together with the main sound engineer (I am just an assistant) coordinate our school's jazz ensemble whenever they perform. We also are in charge of instruments and this involves taking care of the instruments, giving advice on the brands of musical instruments to buy as well as purchasing them when we are given permission. Though I am not so knowledgeable in sound engineering, the chance to learn while doing something I love (music) is what draws me to sound engineering.

Hello,

If you love music and play the guitar - wouldn't talking about playing the guitar be a much stronger argument since you will talk directly about something that you are passionate about? Remember, your goal is to present as strong of an application as you possibly can. -AAO

i think what you presented in the short answer is perfect. it really brings out your passion about sound engineering and music .