Experience which has influence on me ("This language is math")

I like math since I was in elementary school. I attended many math tutorship classes, math contest and savored the magic and creation of math. However, I find most math questions are calculations on numerical or cubical values, then why so many people are still fascinated about it?

Since I entered senior high school, I have further access to math and learn how to establish math models. I used to do a project on how to design an elevator which can suit a particular requirement. It is new to me because it is the first time for me to combine math skills with realistic application. In order to make this model, I investigate the real situation, screen off the data and list all satisfactory factors and transform them into math language: coordinates. After much calculation, we finally arrived at a math formula. When I was so happy with my result, I surprisingly found other groups turned out the better solution. From this, I realized math can never be perfect and only by more cautious and creative work can we better solve real problems in life.

With my further studies in math, I read more books and learned much more. I came to realize that math is a science of number and space and its knowledge is closely related to our real life. Math is typically abstract and logical, with explicit structure and complete system. Also, it is quite applicable. With the development of economic globalization and computer technology, the math is enriched in terms of theory and practice and pushes itself to an even higher level.

Now, I know making math models is the process of realizing the phenomena by describing reality with math language. There are a lot of instruments to describe an objective and existing phenomena such as recording, videoing or metaphor. In order to make description more scientific, logical, objective and repetitive, people tend to adopt a strict language to describe phenomena. This language is math. Then I know the value of math. It is widely applied in all walks of life such as science, engineering, medicine and economics. Therefore, I am resolved to choose math as my university major.

I liked math since I was in elementary school. I attended many math tutorship classes and math contests, because I savored the magic and creation of math. However, I find most math questions are calculations on numerical or cubical values; so, why so many people are still fascinated about it? Add one more sentence to tell what the essay will be about...

Since I entered senior high school, I have had more access to math and learn how to establish math models.

This language is math. Thus, I know the value of math.

Great, thoughtful essay! Still, with more editing, you can make it much better. Try to get friends to read it with you. Also, respond to other people's essays and ask them to respond you yours, here. That way, it will become even more brilliant!

thanks, I do appreciate your help.
By the way, can you help me with the following sentence? I am wondering the meaning of "assessible" in it.
As the interaction between organism and environment has come to be understood, however, effects once assigned to states of mind, feelings, and traits are beginning to be traced to accessible conditions, and a technology of behavior may therefore become available.

With great thanks

"... access to math and learn how to establish..." the word "learn"should be in past tense

also
"i DID a project on how do design an elevator model...it WAS new to be because it WAS the first time"
you should also remember to put the description of your math model process in past tense.

"THOUGH I was so happy with my result, I surprisingly found ..."

As the interaction between organism and environment has come to be understood, however,

effects that used to be thought of as being associated with certain states of mind,

feelings and traits are beginning to be traced to accessible conditions,

and a technology of behavior may therefore become available.

This sentence is saying that certain feelings and traits used to be considered just the results of certain states of mind, but now we think they are largely the result of environmental conditions. Therefore, behavior modification strategies might be possible for certain states of mind for which behavior strategies used to seem impossible.

That really is quite an unclear sentence! It is hard to decipher, and that is not good. It's too bad that text books are often full of bad writing because of the fact that they are valuable for their information rather than for clarity.

thanks, Kelvin.
so accessible means "easty to understand" ? I know its original meaning is "easy to get to"

Yes, isn't that strange? They made it unnecessarily difficult to understand. I had to read it over and over, and I am pretty good at this stuff!

However, the point of "accessible" is to say that something can be done to influence it. That is the point of the statement.

So, it is not that it is easy to understand, but rather, "accessible" in the sense that it is "tangible," so you can access it and influence it.

So, they are talking about the fact that you can manipulate environmental conditions in order to affect feelings and traits.

I think you should take another look at the sentence as it is written in the text book to see if you laft out any words. It seems like it is missing something. Are you sure that is the way the sentence is written?