Please write an essay (250 words minimum) on a topic of your choice or on one of the options listed below. This personal essay helps us to become acquainted with you as a person and student, apart from courses, grades, test scores, and other objective data. It will also demonstrate your ability to organize your thoughts and express yourself.
Prompt:
Evaluate a significant experience, achievement, risk you have taken, or ethical dilemma you have faced and its impact on you.
My Response:
Buzz!!! The alarm clock sounds, indicating that it is five o'clock and time for me to get ready. Getting ready was tedious as I was shaking incessantly due to my nervousness. As I head to the car suited in my uniform, I recite motivational speeches reminding me to stay focused and show no fear. On the long car ride I try to calm myself with the mellow tunes of Barry White however this was not enough.
As we pull up to the YMCA auditorium, my hands begin to sweat profusely. My father notices and asks me, "Are you nervous, Ansel?" I quickly nod to indicate my extreme nervousness. In an attempt to comfort me, he holds my hand as we head to the auditorium. As I walk into the auditorium, my heart begins to pound heavily in my chest. I spot my Sensei, who beckons me, and after a quick word with him I feel calmer. After two grueling hours of waiting it is finally time for my first fight. A week ago my dad had entered me in the white and blue belt division for ages 13 and under; it was only on this day that I had realized that I was the only white belt in my division. With the white belt being the lowest belt in our form of Karate and the blue belt succeeding it, the odds are against me. Despite my disadvantage, I am determined to compete against the more experienced.
As I step unto the mat, I look around myself in attempt to gain confidence from the support of my family and friends and thankfully they were all there for me. Walking to the center of the mat, my opponent and I, following tradition, bow to the referees and each other. It is now time for the fight. He lunges at me, but I swiftly avoid his futile attempt and retaliate with a jab to the stomach. "Point!" the referee yells. It feels great. This is my first point ever in an official tournament. The loud cheers of my supporters encourage me even more and I feel as if I am going to actually win this fight. After a few more punches and kicks, the fight is over and I am the acclaimed victor. This is my first official victory in a Karate tournament and it makes me feel even more confident for my remaining fights. Against all odds, it turns out that I win all of my fights against the blue belts. I am elated as I have won first place in a Karate competition as a white belt against blue belts.
That day I learnt a valuable life lesson - despite all odds, anything is possible. After that day it had finally set in that I could do whatever I set my mind to do as long as I stay focused and determined. Whenever I would encourage others to believe in themselves as they can do whatever they set their minds out to do, I would use my experience and the David and Goliath story as I believe that they bring it home to them. I consider that moment a milestone in my life as it taught me very important life lessons that I would carry with me for the rest of my life.
Kindly leave ANY comments you wish, any ways you think I can make my story stronger, what you think of it and also if there are any errors. I am really concerned with my tense and i'd like to know if it's fine and if not, how may I correct this. Please help me improve my essay and thank you very much in advance for all your comments.
Prompt:
Evaluate a significant experience, achievement, risk you have taken, or ethical dilemma you have faced and its impact on you.
My Response:
Buzz!!! The alarm clock sounds, indicating that it is five o'clock and time for me to get ready. Getting ready was tedious as I was shaking incessantly due to my nervousness. As I head to the car suited in my uniform, I recite motivational speeches reminding me to stay focused and show no fear. On the long car ride I try to calm myself with the mellow tunes of Barry White however this was not enough.
As we pull up to the YMCA auditorium, my hands begin to sweat profusely. My father notices and asks me, "Are you nervous, Ansel?" I quickly nod to indicate my extreme nervousness. In an attempt to comfort me, he holds my hand as we head to the auditorium. As I walk into the auditorium, my heart begins to pound heavily in my chest. I spot my Sensei, who beckons me, and after a quick word with him I feel calmer. After two grueling hours of waiting it is finally time for my first fight. A week ago my dad had entered me in the white and blue belt division for ages 13 and under; it was only on this day that I had realized that I was the only white belt in my division. With the white belt being the lowest belt in our form of Karate and the blue belt succeeding it, the odds are against me. Despite my disadvantage, I am determined to compete against the more experienced.
As I step unto the mat, I look around myself in attempt to gain confidence from the support of my family and friends and thankfully they were all there for me. Walking to the center of the mat, my opponent and I, following tradition, bow to the referees and each other. It is now time for the fight. He lunges at me, but I swiftly avoid his futile attempt and retaliate with a jab to the stomach. "Point!" the referee yells. It feels great. This is my first point ever in an official tournament. The loud cheers of my supporters encourage me even more and I feel as if I am going to actually win this fight. After a few more punches and kicks, the fight is over and I am the acclaimed victor. This is my first official victory in a Karate tournament and it makes me feel even more confident for my remaining fights. Against all odds, it turns out that I win all of my fights against the blue belts. I am elated as I have won first place in a Karate competition as a white belt against blue belts.
That day I learnt a valuable life lesson - despite all odds, anything is possible. After that day it had finally set in that I could do whatever I set my mind to do as long as I stay focused and determined. Whenever I would encourage others to believe in themselves as they can do whatever they set their minds out to do, I would use my experience and the David and Goliath story as I believe that they bring it home to them. I consider that moment a milestone in my life as it taught me very important life lessons that I would carry with me for the rest of my life.
Kindly leave ANY comments you wish, any ways you think I can make my story stronger, what you think of it and also if there are any errors. I am really concerned with my tense and i'd like to know if it's fine and if not, how may I correct this. Please help me improve my essay and thank you very much in advance for all your comments.
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