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'the gift of the Catholic church' - UC someone who has made an impact on your life

dimps95 1 / 1  
Nov 23, 2012   #1
"Write an essay in which you tell us about someone who has made an impact on your life and explain how and why this person is important to you."

St. Francis of Assisi once said, "Sanctify yourself and you will sanctify society." To sanctify means to make one's soul holy and pure from sin. To love unconditionally as one has nothing to gain. To love to an extent that makes others fulfill their faith. She tried to hold me in her womb for nine months, but I decided to come into the world a month early. You would assume that being a premature baby I would have a lot of complications to overcome. The truth was I didn't need to; the unconditional love I was given by my saint mother didn't let me. There were times when my dad picked me up in a towel, because he was afraid of breaking me. I was a tiny, dark brown dot that was too fragile. Growing up I was the shy kid in the crowd. The one who sat in the back, and listened to what others said, did what others said, and when it came to speaking in front of people, I was the one who cried on the spot. My mom was always there to wipe those tears off and ready for the next new thing I wanted to try. My faith is the strongest gift my mother has given me. She always said that a no from god is not a rejection, but a redirection to the path he has laid out for you. As a growing youth in the Catholic Church I was blessed to attend World Youth Day in Madrid, Spain. Celebrating the gift of the Catholic church, and discovering your faith with three million other youth from all around the world was more than what a sixteen year old could ask for on her birthday. Roaming in the streets of Madrid, appreciating life, and finally understanding what and where the unconditional love your mom talks about and expresses comes from. Lord your God has not only gifted you this great life but has taught you to love and only love.

Moreover, I have realized how much your faith connects you to the people of this world. It's never always a coincidence that you meet someone with the same name on the other side of the world. And the same person becomes the older sister you've always wanted. Even though we are two completely different people, we came to a compromise that together we make a perfect person. Just like Christ the son, God the father, and the Holy Spirit are one in the Holy Trinity. Okay, so maybe not that intensely, but she has become a great part of my life. We didn't just talk occasionally after the trip, but there was a point when we talked almost every day. There were times when my parents got too busy and she was the one who listened to my so called "insignificant dilemmas". There were moments when I knew I had to figure it out by myself, but a little hint or advice from my namesake went a long way!

Furthermore, it's exciting to live the moments your faith leads you to. The journey has its moments of manipulating you into a great leader, an instant public speaker, an effective communicator, and even a person who is filled with humor! All thanks to my saintly mother who has lived her life as a strong believer. I finally have a story to tell. The things I did, the places I went, the conversations I have had, the relationships I have made, are all god's blessings. I guess everything does happen for a reason. It's been seventeen years, and I have grown up to be a hundred and forty eight pound, a strong independent woman that is ready to face what they call the "real" world, as if we weren't already living in one.

dumi 1 / 6,928 1592  
Nov 24, 2012   #2
but a redirection to the path he has laid out for youu s.

.... I think ''us'' sounds better, though ''you'' is also ok : )

Well.... without any doubt, you can write really well... all your sentences and ideas are well presented. However, I have a concern that whether you have answered the prompt correctly... It's a bit confusing for me to understand whether its your mom or the god who influenced your life. If it's your mom, you better introduce her character better and tell how she made an impact on your life. It is said here, but the focus on her is less.

If it's the god, reduce the prominence you have given to your mom....
Other than this issue, you have written a really good essay : )
JRSeitz 2 / 4 3  
Nov 24, 2012   #3
You write very well and your ideas are presented relatively clearly. However, I'm confused as to whether you are saying your mother or God affected your life more.

On a side note, I have been told multiple times that taking stances on religion is often not a good idea, considering that the person who sees your essay could be anti-catholic. I myself am catholic, but I avoided bring up religion unless I felt very compelled to do so. However, if you feel like you should bring your beliefs into your essay, I say go for it (just take into account what I said earlier) and God bless.

If you decide to keep God or your mother in your essay, I would recommend putting more emphasis on one or the other, but not both. You could focus on God, and mention your mother sparingly, or vice versa. Either way, it is good to show that you have a definite person (or God) to answer the prompt.

Good luck!

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