Good Health - UW Madison something in life that goes unnoticed

This is just a really rough draft of my essay, so be as critical as needed. Thanks for your help!

Day by day people live their life carelessly and without appreciating it, not realizing that at any given moment everything could be taken away from them. Rarely does someone appreciate being healthy while they are actually healthy, however the moment they get ill they wish to be well again. That is why, in my opinion, something in life that goes unnoticed is good health.

My family had a harsh realization of how quickly this can be taken away during my sophomore year. It was mid-December and I was at work when my mom came in and told my manager that she needed me to go to the hospital with her. It turns out my grandma's heart had stopped and she had gone into sudden cardiac arrest. Being a heavy smoker for over 60 years, it was expected that her organs had weakened, however she had shown no signs of feeling unwell. Luckily for her, she was at a hotel where they had on site paramedics who were able to restart her heart. For the next few months she spent a lot of time in and out of the hospital due to the side effects of technically dying. A few weeks after my grandma's condition had seemed to stabilize, my grandpa had woken up with the inability to breathe. It turns out he had been virtually drowning because his lungs had been filling up with fluid. He was released a few days after his admission, however he had to carry around an oxygen tank with him for 6 months, so he too spent a lot of time at the hospital during this time period.

That year my family had spent both Christmas and Easter in the hospital and although it was a stressful time for my entire family, it was a reality check. Life isn't something we should take for granted, nor is the ability to live easily and healthily. We all grew from these months, and this time spent within the hospital walls was a time when I realized that is where I want to be. The nurses at that hospital who helped both my grandparents were so genuine and caring that I could only hope to be like them one day. So despite the tough experience, I now know what I want to start a career in and what in life really is important.

Day by day people live their life carelessly...
It looks nice if there is 'number agreement', so you write: ...people live their lives..

And you can change this word to give the sentence a nice rhythm:
...and without appreciating appreciation, not realizing..

I think you can do something better with the last sentence of the first paragraph. If you think about that sentence, and what message it carries, you'll see that it doesn't carry a big enough message. It only answers the question about what concept you want to focus on as an example of something that is unnoticed. What else would you like to say about it? I see that you have a theme of appreciation in this paper. A person cannot appreciate something if they do not notice it. There really is quite a lot we don't notice, and I think you can use this theme of appreciation to send an insightful message - one that is interesting to the reader. Give your best sentence at the end of the first paragraph.

I really like your idea for this essay, explaining that you felt inspired by the healthcare professionals who help your family. Now, I think you can improve the persuasiveness of the essay by in colluding some comments about what you did - what action you actually have taken - in response to this calling toward (nursing?). For example, have you been reading about different philosophies of nursing and of medicine? You might have a favorite book or a favorite researcher making advances in the area of specialization that most interests you.

It will be great if you can give some discussion of that near the end of the paper.

: )