Unanswered [6] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Undergraduate   % width   Posts: 4


'growing up in a single parent household' - Critique UT Essay C



britttt4 3 / 9  
Nov 15, 2012   #1
The topic is as follows: There may be personal information that you want considered as part of your admissions application. Write an essay describing that information. You might include exceptional hardships, challenges, or opportunities that have shaped or impacted your abilities or academic credentials, personal responsibilities, exceptional achievements or talents, educational goals, or ways in which you might contribute to an institution committed to creating a diverse learning environment.

My essay -

"Exceptional hardships, challenges, or opportunities" make me think of about a million things that have happened throughout my short eighteen years of life. However, I think the biggest challenge I have had to face is growing up in a single parent household. I never thought much of living in a single parent home; it was a norm to me, even though I always knew that a father figure was missing. Although, most of my friends had both parents at home, living in San Antonio, Texas with close to five hundred thousand households that have only one parent present, single parent households are not far fetched.

This has always been a motivating factor for me in more ways than one. However, I think the most important is that I knew at an early age that I wanted to be successful because I have seen my mother struggle to make ends meet for all of my life. I was rarely able to go the movies with friends; I did not get new clothes every year; I never received the toys I asked for. My mother has had to stretch a very small income across the rent, the bills, her needs, and mine. For as long as I can remember, I have worried about whether or not her income was going to stretch too far one month, and because of this, I got a job at the age of sixteen. Although balancing work and school has been difficult, I manage to make it work because I know that it takes a lot of stress off my mother. Through this, not only have I learned the value of a dollar, but also I've learned that an impeccable work ethic is going to get me far in life. I devote as much time as I can to my studies, while still balancing Cross Country and Track, and doing my best to be a picture perfect employee.

Although growing up in a single parent household has been challenging for the majority of my life, my mother's unfortunate circumstances are not an excuse for me. I don't believe in saying "I can't" simply because I don't always have the means that I need. Getting a job was a way for me to provide for myself during my high school career, a way of going after what I ultimately want in life - success. I don't see my upbringing in a single parent household has as an "exceptional hardship" or a "challenge" but instead it has been an opportunity that has shaped my work ethic within in school, within my job, and even within running. I strive for the best possible race time, best grades, and the best customer service. What others may see as a setback, I see as a blessing that has bettered me as a person, student, and employee. My single parent has taught me what the definition of work ethic is - Hard work that is worthy of a reward. In my case, that reward will eventually be success.

504 words.

Can this be a good little supplement/optional essay to submit?

Jennyflower81 - / 674  
Nov 17, 2012   #2
Hi, I just read your essay and I think it is great. I love the topic, and you wrote it with great purpose and intelligence. You make many good points, and you show yourself to be a mature individual. I think this is a good essay to send in, because it shows your personality and gives more detail about your background. It shows that you have lived a life that is real, and you have already learned a great lesson. I think you did very well with this essay. There is one part that I think you should adjust:

Although, most of my friends had both parents at home, living in San Antonio, Texas with close to five hundred thousand households that have only one parent present, single parent households are not far fetched.

This sentence is kinda long and a bit distracting. Otherwise, great job! Good luck in school :)
OP britttt4 3 / 9  
Nov 17, 2012   #3
Thank you so much! I'll reword this sentence and send it in :)
ajok - / 2  
Nov 17, 2012   #4
just one little typo "within in school" to within my school, other than that its great


Home / Undergraduate / 'growing up in a single parent household' - Critique UT Essay C
Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳

Academic AI Writer:
Custom AI Writer ◳