Describe the world you come from ï for example, your family, community or school ï and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.
Growing up I never had a mother, she was absent from my life ever since I was two years old. Not having a mother by my side has been challenging. My father had full custody of me but because of the harsh break up with my mother he was emotionally unstable. Financially, my father struggled due to the fact that he does not have a college education. For my dad to be able to support our family, my grandparents helped him out by taking care of my sister and I while my dad went to work.
You could describe my dad as abusive, frightening, and violent. Because my family is from a poor third world country, the way I have been raised is very old fashioned and strict. If I walked out of the house in anything my dad disapproved of I would get a "beating" for it. I never understood why he was so heated all the time or why everybody around me could wear things that I was not allowed to wear. When I reached middle school, I saw girls my age all around me. They dressed the way I wanted to dress and I remember the glitter sparkling around their eyes. I felt like an outcast, I wanted to fit in. My choice was going against what my dad wanted and being abused when I got home or going to school feeling ashamed and embarrassed of who I was. For years I was made fun of for what I wore and what I looked like.
The day came and I turned eleven years old. This was the day I met my mother, Lily Sarkisyan, for the first time. Honestly, it was exceptionally uncomfortable the moment I saw her due to the years she was never around. I then later met my African American grandmother, inspiring my major of African American Studies or also known as Black Studies. I never knew such things about the other branch of my family. It had always been my dad's side of the family that I was associated with.
Living a hard childhood has shaped my aspirations. I want to further my education by attending school at the University of California. Author, Nora Roberts once said "If you don't go after what you want, you'll never have it. If you don't ask, the answer is always no. If you don't step forward, you're always in the same place." I have experienced my father go through life without stepping forward, dwelling over his past, and therefore he has always stayed in the same place. Although the world I come from has been a troubling rollercoaster ride, I want to take what I've experienced and make sure to live the life I want. Instead of dreading over the past, I realize that life is a succession of lessons which must be lived to be understood.
I want to further my education because education gives us the knowledge of the world around us. Education is important to me because it develops in us a perspective of looking at life and most importantly education equips us with all that is needed to make our dreams come true.
PLEASE LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK-ITS DUE TOMORROW!
you could write more about your aspirations instead of telling your childhood
b/c it says describe the world you came from, BUT THEY WANT YOU TO TELL THEM ABOUT HOW THAT WORLD AFFECTS YOUR DREAM AND ASPIRATION
college might wants to know about how you overcame your childhood without your mother and how your grandmother gave you aspirations to have major
also you can tell them more positive things while you are growing up!
those are just my opinions,,
if you don't like it, wait for the answers!
I like the overall topic of your essay very much. The negative aspect of your childhood and relationship with you're father is very strong and touching, however you may want to express more thoroughly how this has shaped your dreams. Possibly make it more neutral, and say...although this happened, it has taught me to...I really like you're second to last paragraph, and i would suggest either combining it with you're last paragraph or separating you're second to last and adding it to the last.
