The Haunted House Next Door

There I stood gazing upon the broken down house, shivering, as though ice had replaced my spine. The path leading up to the house was filled with cracks with weeds and sprouts poking out of them. I slowly walked up to the doorway. The door was towered over my like I was microscopic an ant its corners were filled with dusty cobwebs housing multiple armies of little spiders. Cornering me were monstrous trees with thick branches shaped llike old shrivelled up witch fingers. The manner in which they were moving sent an alarming shiver up my spine.

As the large doors creaked open a musty odor crept into my nose. The house was dead and silent except for the loud creaks and moans. Dark filthy mold dotted the walls and ceilings. I slowly entered the dark living room. Moonlight struggled to penetrate the grim covered windows. The Sofa was sunken showing deep depressions where the family used to seat. Picture frames stood firmly on the wall showing an image of the life story of this mysterious family. The fireplace cold as though it hadn't been touched for years. A grand bookcase stood tall by the corner untouched for years with that one book that may have led to a secret labyrinth.

Walking back down the corridor my eyes spotted a dark gloomy light shimmering from this one mysterious door. I approached and opened the door. Small tiny drops of water dripped slowly into the large human sized bucket. The cupboards were filled with teeth cleaning utensils and body wash.

Continuing my Journey I arrived at the foot of the staircase. I cautiously walked up the creaky steps with each step my heart was beating faster until it was a drum roll. I walked up the long corridor, upon reaching the end there was a large door that seemed to have belonged to the master of the house. The room was large and has a huge dresser leaning against the wall. The bed was made for two which meant a mistress must have also been there. The wind intensified outside, the rustling of leaves and branches were louder and in the corner an old crafted armchair began to rock slowly.

A loud howl echoed through the house. I decided it was time to leave. I closed the bedroom door and carefully crept back down the stairs and made my way out the door. As I arrived home my parents asked me what took me so long; I replied "escaping the ghost was difficult

Nilbert, when you are writing a descriptive horror story, you have to pay attention to the words that you use in order to describe the scenario. You cannot involve the reader and tickle his imagination to activity when you have missing descriptions such as the movement of the tree branches. How do you imagine the fingers of a witch moving? That should have been included in the description because it would help to establish the mindset of the person in the story. Was he seeing things because of fear? Or was he just scaring himself?

Pay particular attention to our grammar and punctuation. Review the narrative carefully and you will see that you will need to correct a few of those issues, particularly in paragraph 2. The story itself feels incomplete. What was the purpose of the house and the rooms? Was it an slaughterhouse for humans? What exactly did the room depict itself as?

There are number of loopholes in your story that exist mostly because of the lack of a backstory for the house. Was the person there to prove a myth or folklore to himself? What was the purpose of his exploration? What ghost was he running away from? Did his parents send him to the house?

Basically you need to develop a point to the story. Right now, what you have is the middle of the story. You need to create a proper beginning and a strong conclusion that accurately wraps up the story for the reader.