Hi guys. First timer here. I'm a little hesitant to actually have the name of the school in the essay since it is a very competitive Liberal Arts institution. Anyways the question was how did you find out about the school in 300 characters. Here is what I've got
A current <school> student, and good friend,was always boasting about <5 character school>. After one visit and info session at <School>, I understood why. The concept of shaping my own college experience around diverse individuals who share a dedication to learning was an amazing combination quickly drew me to <school>.
Most of you guys probably already know the name. I would really appreciate if no one blurted the name out. Anyways is this sufficient to answer "How did you find out about <school>?
I'm sorry I don't mean to sound rude, but I really find it offense you're keeping the institute name a secret. We have students applying to Yale, Harvard and are very open with it .Naming the title "competitive school" then telling people not to blab out the name of the school is not necessary. There is no need to be so discrete. We are not worried about what school you're applying to, we want to help you with your essays and every detail helps the reader...
Now back to the topic.
A current <school> student, and good friend, was always boasting about <5 character school>. Mention what about the boasting caught your attention.
After one visit and info session at <School>, I understood why. This is not clear, what did the info session made you understand?
The concept of shaping my own college experience around diverse individuals who share a dedication to learning was an amazing combination quickly drew me to <school>. Few grammar errors, but good ending.
Overall, try to be more articulate in describing how your friend boasting and the school session drew you into <school>. ]Since you're limited to 300 characters just get straight to the point I'll be glad to look over the new version.
Ugh... Though I am a bit annoyed by your pride, I am even more so doubtful of your claim... As another class of 2013 high schooler, I am also looking into liberal arts -with the exception of Brown, Georgetown and Tufts- and I know the names of many "very competitive" liberal arts institutions -as I am aiming on a few top tier liberal arts. But your mention of the five-character name pretty much proved your claim bogus -unless you are caught up in self-delusion. Though rankings may vary depending on the source, the ranks of the top twenty-ish schools are pretty much laid out clear. And there is barely a school with a five character name within the top 20 range, and certainly none in the top 10 range. And very much like what fefe said, I will say that there are plenty others who are applying to the top tier -notably the HYP- schools, so just say what school it is if you want us to help...
Besides that, I have some words of advice for you in writing your essay. Your answer as I see above is trite. I guarantee you there will be hundreds of others writing in a similar fashion, if not better. Unless you have stellar grades, standardized test scores and EC, every word in your essay counts. DO NOT WASTE A SINGLE WORD. Make every one of them say something about you.
And sorry for breaking this bad news, but I believe that you should take a different turn here. If there is something about the school you really like -as in majors or social/academic experience- tap into that. But YOU NEED TO TELL ME WHAT SCHOOL IT IS so that I can help you with that...
OK ok sorry guys im just paranoid...its brown. Thanks for the feedback though
Again sorry
Ah, no probs bud:P I think I was myself paranoid in my last comment. Had to do with something else that happened before I read your post...
And Brown isn't a liberal arts. It is a university -hence my questioning as to what competitive liberal arts.
Anyways, is there a specific major you're looking into? Or at least a specific aspect to the academics or social life?
Brown has a great IR program and an even more fabulous Pre-med/Biology courses. If that's the direction you're looking into, you should incorporate those ideas and your desires/what you have done in those areas. Remember: you are trying to sell yourself here. You need to advertise those great aspects about yourself.
For the 300 character essays should I just jump into my main point without any segway or should there be some sort of introduction?
Well, if it is 300 chars instead of 300 words, you can't afford to waste any letters. Jump to your main point. The key is limpid writing, and don't forget to be straightforward and honest -very personal that is;
You should figure out what story will make you stand out over the crush of other applicants.