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How helping others helps you? MIT essay



AABMOSALAM1998 4 / 11  
Feb 15, 2017   #1
At MIT, we bring people together to better the lives of others. MIT students work to improve to their communities in different ways, from tackling the world's biggest challenges to being a good friend. Describe one way in which you have contributed to your community, whether in your family, the classroom, your neighborhood, etc. (200-250 words)*

useful answers - not only taking but giving



During high school, I personally depended mostly on my personal study the most. With it, I loved to teach and answer people's questions not for money but as something voluntary. So, I joined a website called Openstudy which helped guide users who were staying late at night burning the midnight oil working on problem sets, maybe watching a video lecture like I did too and they have their doubts and who will they turn to? Open study bridges that gap by connecting people studying the same things so that you can talk to each other and help each other. As an independent learner, I wanted to give help as well, it's nice to feel that you are not alone when you are cramming for a Math exam. I think it's easy to deliver lectures to people in a playlist of videos, but what's really hard was to scale the help you get, the small discussion, the 1 on 1 help that you may get a prestigious school or university. Many of whom I have contributed to have scored high grades through the better understanding of the topic, they have developed by my guidance. Usually, I don't straight give away the answers to a user, but I ask them to post their exact doubt regarding their question and start together from this point with the process of learning. Throughout my time in open study, I have earned a total of 732 medals on my quality of my answers.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15388  
Feb 15, 2017   #2
We need to create a better opening statement for your response. Right now, the way the sentence is grammatically structured, the reviewer will most likely be confused by what you trying to say. So rather than using what you have now, you can either use this new opening statement I wrote for you or, you can try to develop one yourself using my suggestion as a template or example for your work. I would open the essay by saying:

As a high school student, I took great pride in being a good Math ( or whatever subject) student who had the skills to help others who found the subject difficult. It was this skill in providing assistance to students who otherwise would not pass the course that led me to join the online community called Open Study. As an independent learner...

Another minor problem the essay has is your problem with capitalizing proper nouns. Remember that Open Source is a proper noun because it is the name of a place so it has to be capitalized. Yes, even if that place is in cyberspace. Since these two minor points are the only problematic parts of your essay, I would say that you did a very good job on responding to this prompt. You have shown that you can understand the prompt and also develop relevant responses for it when you choose to apply yourself to the prompt provided. Very good work!
OP AABMOSALAM1998 4 / 11  
Feb 15, 2017   #3
As a high school student, I took great pride in being a good chemistry student who had the skills to help others who found the subject difficult. It was this skill in providing assistance to students who otherwise would not pass the course that led me to join the online community called Open Study. As an independent learner who had no one to turn to, I think it's easy to deliver lectures to people in the form of a playlist of videos, but what's difficult was the scale of help you get instead, the one on one help and discussions are missing that you may get at a prestigious school or university. Through Open study, I was able to connect with users whose doubts are filled their minds about a lecture they have just finished listening to and talk to them to help clear things up. Fortunately, Many of whom I have contributed to have scored high grades through the better understanding of the topic they have developed by my guidance. Usually, I don't give away straight answers to a user instead I ask them to post their exact doubt regarding their question and from this point, the process of learning starts and finishes when his/her doubts are clear and ready to move onto the next topic. Over my time on Open study I earned a total of 732 medals on my quality of my answers.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15388  
Feb 15, 2017   #4
Congratulations on writing a prompt responsive statement in a shorter time than before ! This statement that you wrote shows a sense of maturity and a clear understanding of the prompt. While the rest of the essay has some grammatical errors, it does not reduce the impact of your essay. Since you were able to fix the opening statement, the rest of the essay, regardless of improper grammar, now makes a lot of sense when the reviewer reads it. Consider this essay finalized and ready for use. You can set this version aside for submission. If you have any other essays to write, you should begin drafting your response now. I hope to see continued improvement over your next set of essays. I am excited to see your English comprehension skills progress through your college application essay writing.
OP AABMOSALAM1998 4 / 11  
Feb 15, 2017   #5
I would not have finished it earlier than I did in my previous essays without your help, thank you so much. I finished my fourth and final essay but I am waiting for others to ask questions that I could provide help on.


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