The prompt was to write abount an experience that was intellectually engaging.
Heroin. Before meeting Mrs. Kulkarni, I couldn't tell you anything about it other than that heroin is the highly addictive drug of choice for Hollywood rock stars, as movies had taught me. But beyond that, I was clueless. Now I can draw its chemical structure and detail how it interacts with the brain. In class, Mrs. Kulkarni mostly discussed organic compounds and chemical reactions with us, but afterward she would talk with anyone who wanted to stay about the real life applications of chemistry. We talked about everything from inorganic nomenclature to global warming to the development of drugs. I was fascinated to discover the methods by which medicines are developed and exactly how chemical substances interact with the body. I was so intrigued that I began researching drugs such as Thalidomide and antibiotics, realizing that my former philosophy of "a little medicine every once in a while won't kill you" was entirely erroneous. I now question everything from the allergy pills I take twice a day to my doctor's decision to treat my minor ear infection with a round of antibiotics. I recognize that while I may not choose to be a nuclear chemist, it is paramount to have a fundamental understanding of all the sciences in order to make educated decisions that could affect not only myself, but the world. Although I am eager to study psychology and literature, my experience with chemistry has provoked me to learn everything I can from all areas of study.
Is this awful?
Any thoughts would be appreciated.
I thinks its quite good. But maybe a little too general, talk a little more about the actual experience that you found intellectually engaging, and explain why in fact it was intellectually engaging. Was it the heroin class? or Mr.Kulkarni's class in general? it's a little confusing. Focus on the topic of the essay, with clear details.
hope this helps
I would be a little more specific either about what it is about heroin in particular that fascinated (since that's what you started the essay with) or else about how the class fascinated you (which I think is what really fascinated you). Strong essay though, I like the line about "all areas of study"-- shows the plurality of your learning interests (which is exactly what they're looking for in a student).