Would you mind helping me with transfer essay? I'm not native speaker, but language should be more or less fine. I'm more concerned about general impression. :)
In the second class of high school I was invited by government to visit nuclear reactor Maria in Swierk. Massive aluminium cylinders containing fragile, low-enriched uranium fuel elements cooled by flowing water, and two rooms full of busy scientists and equippment to control it. Though physics was one of my main fields of interest before, the opportunity to see blooming center of its development, to speak with professionals who devoted their lives to discover how nature works, was crucial in shaping my future goals.
...
In the second class of high school (not exactly sure what this means, do you mean your second year of high school?) I was invited by (the) government to visit (a) nuclear reactor Maria in Swierk. (The reactor contained) massive aluminium cylinders containing fragile, low-enriched uranium fuel elements cooled by flowing water, and two rooms full of busy scientists and equipment to control it. Though physics was one of my main fields of interest before, the opportunity to see blooming center of its development (not sure what this means), to speak with professionals who devoted their lives to discover how nature works, was (were) crucial in shaping my future goals. (From an engineering perspective) (the) research center located with reactor was beautiful, but something different impressed me more than applications of advanced equipment: the years of conceptual work leading to its creation, (the) theoretical predictions allowing for engineers to do their work (-) physics in its purest form.
(my) Interest in particle physics lead me to decision to apply to (the) University of Glasgow, distinguished by far better (its far superior) theoretical physics department than any university in my country. In Scotland I have met wonderful people from all around the Europe and had a chance to learn from inspiring specialist in range of science fields. Especially good choice was the astronomy course, who showed me another, astonishing side of physics, astrophysics. (weird wording, maybe "I made the right decision in enrolling in the astronomy course because it showed me another astonishing side of physics: astrophysics") I found the strong relation between particle physics and cosmology remarkably interesting, but at the same time hard to pursue in classical education, characteristic for (of) British education. That is why in the break between semesters I decided that to seek for (a) more individual, academically diverse educational environment in United States. American higher education offers more freedom in choice of subjects and broad range of specialization. This system is known for its personal approach toward students and appreciation of creativity. This modern approach would allow me to pursue interdisciplinary studies and teach me practical use(s) of my knowledge in (a) scientific career.
Despite academical reasons for transferring I have also another motivation. Pushing forward. Decision to apply to University of Glasgow was in some way a compromise between ambition and keeping sense of safety. Scotland is two hours by plane from my home city; it's (and is) close culturally as well. But somewhere in my mind there have (has) always been an intension (intent) to study in diverse, full of opportunities USA. Glasgow was (will be) a first step. first challenge - s Starting a college can be hard enough without 800 km change of environment and leaving everything known behind, which I did by moving to Great Britain on my own. But after those months spend learning from people from different cultures, successfully using second language on daily basis and studies on highest level, I've learned that studying abroad isn't in fact leaving anything behind, but (rather) opening yourself for new (new what?). Now I feel much more ready for fascinating experience, that studying in United States would be, than at the end of my high school. ("I feel much more prepared for the fascinating experiences I'll gain while studying in the United States").
Good luck with your application! ):
