Many cultures have settled in the western world and being part of two cultures can be difficult at times. I have been raised in America, but come from an Indian family. This can be very difficult when our modern western lifestyle clashes with our parents hopes and wishes. One very important example of such a clash is the concept of an arranged marriage. Some people believe in love at first sight, while other people believe that it takes time to love someone. It is hard to form a relationship with someone whom you do not even know. In order to build a strong bond between two people it takes time, patience, and trust. If that relationship goes well then it ends in a marriage. However, there are still some cultures out there that do not allow their children to meet that special someone on their own. The idea of an arranged marriage is usually an agreement between two families rather than the couple getting married. Denying an arranged marriage is usually a sign of disrespect toward the family. The true definition of marriage is when there is no checklist of requirements outside of human emotions. The only prerequisite is love. Although I was raised in America all my life, I was grown up with the fact that I will one day have an arranged marriage.
Right when I graduated from high school, my mother started to find matchmakers from the Indian community involved to find a right guy for me. Every time a family came to see me or every time my parents sent pictures of me to the opposite side, I was rejected. I felt like I was being put on display and waiting for someone to buy me. Every time we would get the same response, "she is too short, and she has very dark skin color." Having an arranged marriage meant that the relationship starts with looks and not trust, love or friendship. I always thought to myself, how can I live with a person who only knows me from the outside. Although nowadays arrange marriages allow the guy and girl to see each other and talk for couple of hours or maybe even meet a couple of times before they get married. But the question is, is meeting a couple of times enough in order to decide if you can spend your whole life with that person? I can understand that arrange marriages are a part of my culture, but I too understand there we should be at least provided with one chance to find someone whom we want to spend our lives with. I do not have a problem with an arrange marriage, because I know that my parents do what is best for me, but every girl has a dream.
Marriage is not a social arrangement.
Marriage is not a business deal. Marriage is the union of two old souls who have finally found each other after an eternity, and this is hard to become possible in an arranged marriage. "There is only one happiness in life, to love, and be loved," George Land.
Right when I graduated from high school, my mother started to find matchmakers from the Indian community involved to find a right guy for me. Every time a family came to see me or every time my parents sent pictures of me to the opposite side, I was rejected. I felt like I was being put on display and waiting for someone to buy me. Every time we would get the same response, "she is too short, and she has very dark skin color." Having an arranged marriage meant that the relationship starts with looks and not trust, love or friendship. I always thought to myself, how can I live with a person who only knows me from the outside. Although nowadays arrange marriages allow the guy and girl to see each other and talk for couple of hours or maybe even meet a couple of times before they get married. But the question is, is meeting a couple of times enough in order to decide if you can spend your whole life with that person? I can understand that arrange marriages are a part of my culture, but I too understand there we should be at least provided with one chance to find someone whom we want to spend our lives with. I do not have a problem with an arrange marriage, because I know that my parents do what is best for me, but every girl has a dream.
Marriage is not a social arrangement.
Marriage is not a business deal. Marriage is the union of two old souls who have finally found each other after an eternity, and this is hard to become possible in an arranged marriage. "There is only one happiness in life, to love, and be loved," George Land.
