Keeping Your Stomach and Heart Full

PROMPT: From what frequent activity do you derive your greatest joy? Why is this activity meaningful to you, and how does it shape your perspective on life?(In 500 words or less)

I need help adding and editing this essay. I currently have 280 words and would like to expand it. Thank you so much in advance!

I believe that joy starts in the kitchen. The moment the smell of tomato sauce and sautéed chicken sweeps into my room, I sprint downstairs hoping to get a taste. Despite the tired look on my mom's face after a hard day at work, I can't help but smile seeing her in her little yellow apron. I receive joy from helping out my mom and making her day a bit easier. Half wanting to help and the other half wanting to get a taste of dinner early, I grab the other apron, eager to help.

These are the times I cherish the most. The times when I can create something so delicious and intricate out of things so ordinary. But most of all, I value moments in the kitchen because it gives me the opportunity to produce something that inevitably brings everyone together: food.

I look forward to dinner every day. Not only for the food, but for the time I get to spend with my family. It is a time when I can share laughs, frustrations, and sorrows. After going through the day, dinner is the time to recuperate and bring the whole team back together to reconnect. In between each bite of food is a smile.

Life can be hectic sometimes. It is important to set aside a time to come together. There is no better way than to end the day with good food and great company. Despite busy schedules, dinner has brought my family together and made me realize that life is about spending time with those you love to keep you connected and grounded. Cooking good meals allows both stomachs and hearts to be full.

Yoosol, I believe expanding this essay is the first priority that should be achieved. Editing this essay can come after your essay has been expanded to a minimum words count. I assume that is quite acceptable in length, but your second paragraph is another story. It is unfortunate that you stop your paragraph by mentioning an open plot. It brings some questions to the reader. When you say "...produce something that inevitably brings everyone together: food." Why food? Why not money? Why not job? Why not music concert? There are lots of things that can brings everyone together but why did you choose food? What is so special with it?.

From the above-mentioned example, questioning your paragraph, especially the last sentence, would help you to expand your paragraph to a certain extent in order to answer your question. Try to do that in the rest of the paragraph, is it still questionable? if yes, what is the question? and you can just give your answer there.

Hope this helps :)

While you do mention that joy starts in the kitchen, you end up discussing dinner as the main activity that gives you the most joy. Therefore, there is a slight disconnect between the opening statement foundation and your concluding paragraph. It would benefit your essay if you could expand upon how cooking with your mother helps to bring you great joy and satisfaction as well. The act of cooking the meal should be represented as a bonding moment between you and her as mother and daughter. You know, kind of like portraying the time you spend together cooking the meal as a private moment where the two of you learn about each other in a way that a meal with the family cannot allow. If you expand upon the discussion with your mother as the two of you prepare the meal, then the essay will gain an informative and relevant length in terms of the prompt requirements. I am just concerned because the essay says to pick one activity and you are presenting two. I think that it would be in the best interest of your essay if you decide between cooking with your mother and having dinner with the family as the response to opt for in presenting the essay. Always adhering to the prompt requirements is essential when reviewers consider your essay so we should do exactly that. I vote for the cooking in the kitchen experience. Whatever you pick though, is fine with me.