The prompt is "Describe a character in fiction, a historical figure, or a creative work (as in art, music, science, etc.) that has had an influence on you, and explain that influence. "
Please correct any grammar errors and strange phrase. I am not really familiar with English expression. I tried my best though :) Thank you.
Have you ever heard of a vertical fiddle with two strings? This Korean traditional instrument, the Haegeum is what I play. Like they do with other fiddles, those who are just starting to learn to play the haegeum produce a scratchy and ugly sound that makes people uncomfortable, even themselves. As my life needs an abundance of experiences and efforts, the haegeum needs a skilled grip and delicate touch to produce beautiful sounds and the right tune.
About seven years ago, I attended a concert where one musician performed the haegeum solo. I was deeply fascinated by the instrument that created sounds ranging from delight to melancholy. Enchanted by the atmosphere, I dreamed of playing the haegeum like the musician. On the day of my first lesson, however, I could not even hold the bow in the right position, and I was making squeaking sounds. Despite this, it awoke an indomitable spirit within me. I poured relentless energy and time into practice to bring my playing to a level where the ear-splitting sounds of my first day became nothing more than a distant, fading memory.
After the long tough period, I finally gained some minimum skills and techniques that allowed me to perform passably in front of an audience. My improved skill turned out to be a blessing. I was presented with the opportunity to be a teen representative in a cultural exchange event with China and was to perform the haegeum. Before the performance I worried that my performance would leave a negative impression about Korean music. However, after the performance, the audiences applauded with sincere appreciation beyond any I ever expected. This experience boosted my confidence while instilling a resolve to continue to strive toward improving my playing skills.
When I came to the USA, I felt like a beginner again, playing the haegeum for the very first time. Including my poor English, I had to face many difficulties and strange situations. I chose to play the haegeum which is difficult and complicated to play compared to other ordinary instruments that create the sound by simple touches. I chose a new environment by leaving my familiar homeland, and I persevered through that tough period of adaptation that is sometimes long and harsh. Whenever I felt exhausted, I reminded myself of playing the haegeum - which I could reach a higher level of playing the haegeum and perform in front of others after long period of practicing.
As I am maturing with new experiences, my life grows more abundant every day. I believe when I do my best, I can create the most beautiful sound that touches people's heart. Even though it seems far to reach high level, I will keep practicing until I can play with professional skills and share my passion with the audience. As I am stretching areas within my life, expanding my knowledge, I really hope to expand the places of my haegeum performance to the campus of my dream school someday.
This Korean traditional instrument, the Haegeum, is what I play.
Like they do with other fiddles , those who are just starting to learn to play the haegeum produce a scratchy and ugly sound that makes people uncomfortable, even themselves.
Awkward wording. Try "Beginners learning how to play the haegeum produce..."
Just as my life needs an abundance of experiences and efforts
Even though it seems far to reach high level
This part is a bit confusing. Can you reword it to make yourself more clear?
Good essay :) I agree with you, though. I don't think this fits in with Option 4 on the Common App. If I were you, I would just put this under Option 6, topic of your choice.
hey
if you really want to fit option 4, maybe u can personify it like it's a person?
maybe u can make a metaphor of the hageum to urself like when u came to america?
overall, good
help with mine too! thanks
