'To me, a leader is someone who takes the first step into the unknown while others wait and watch'

Virginia Tech Entrance Essay
John F. Kennedy once said, "Leadership and learning are indispensable to each other." How do you feel that your experience at Virginia Tech will help foster the relationship between leadership and learning? (Max 250 Words)

To me, a leader is someone who takes the first step into the unknown while others wait and watch. As I plan to pursue a career in the medical field, Virginia Tech will be a fundamental part of my career. I am a firm believer that innovation and a progressive way of thinking is imperative to leading the world to a brighter future. At Virginia Tech, I will have the opportunity to advance discoveries and solve real world problems. Virginia Tech's College of Science has been noted to produce the next generation of scientific leaders. With the top-tier facilities, resources, and experienced professors that Virginia Tech offers, I believe that I will have an impact global development while expanding my knowledge of the world and beyond.

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Varad, there is plenty of room for improvement in your essay. Content wise, there are some questions and ideas that you need to further develop. You have only 188 words right now. Since I am requesting you to delete certain irrelevant portions, you will have even more word count to play in while you develop the essay further :-) I have also left you with some guide questions that are geared towards improving the information within your essay.


- Using what facilities or learning opportunities at Virginia Tech? Let us know how you plan to utilize the resources of the university.


- This statement only takes away from your word count. It does not help to advance the essay.


- Mention one of the notable programs or internships that is of particular interest to you and explain how you feel your participation in the program will help you expand your knowledge and eventually, have an impact on world health issues.


- Don't you mean scientific questions of today? Scientific trends tends to mean that answers have already been found and the science is being further developed.


- The admissions officer already knows that. Try to avoid word fillers. Every word counts towards better expressing and explaining yourself.


- How do you expect that to happen? What do you expect to learn while at Virginia Tech? Is there any professor or doctor in particular that you look forward to having as a mentor in the future? Such references show the kind of medical field you are interested in and may be successful in once you graduate from medical school.

Let's develop the essay content first and fix the grammar and sentence structure problems later :-)

I edited some of it, but I am having trouble focusing on leadership and concluding the essay.

To me, a leader is someone who takes the first step into the unknown while others wait and watch. As I plan to pursue a career in the medical field, Virginia Tech will be a fundamental part of my career. I am a firm believer that innovation and a progressive way of thinking is imperative to leading the world to a brighter future. Being interested in the medical field, the college of science will play a large role in my career; specifically the department of biochemistry. The department of biochemistry has been acknowledged to advance discoveries and solve real world problems by studying various diseases for diagnosis purposes. With modern biochemical and molecular biological research facilities and dedicated professors, scientists, and technicians that Virginia Tech offers, I believe that I will have an impact on global development while expanding my knowledge of the world. Virginia Tech's Integrated Science Curriculum will help me provide solutions to several significant mysteries of today. Virginia Tech's research facilities and insightful staff will not only help me explore energy on environment, infectious diseases, Nano science, and developmental science but help me progress the world of biochemistry. I hope that my studies in the college of science will pioneer research into biochemistry.

Varad, go to the Virginia Tech website, click on Housing and Residence Life. On the left hand side, you will see a run down of housing opportunities. You want to read about the Living Learning Communities. There are 4 options available. All of the housing communities available look for a particular type of student leader to be a member of the community. Review the requirements for the residents of the communities and then relate it to your vision of leadership and how it ties in with the Virginia Tech experience. The overview of the communities explain a little bit about the leadership roles that the student members are expected to participate in so it should help point you in the right direction with regards to the question of:


I believe it is worth a shot for you to read and consider. It just may help you focus on leadership and the conclusion of the essay. Consider instead that the essay asks you discuss leadership in terms of community participation. Something that one will not know about if you do not search the school website. Review the section I recommended and then write the essay based upon your understanding of the material in relation to the prompt. I believe that you will be amazed to see how totally different your new answer to the prompt will be from your first two versions :-)