Hello, the essay is asking me about how i intend to be a leader as a student and as an alumnus in the university. I have to send this essay in two hours and i am still not sure it is good. can someone please help me, any last time changes should i make, improvements.. do you have an advice for me please say what your honest opinion about my essay is and i promise to help you out with yours (post a link to your essay along with your comment about mine).
LEADERSHIP ROLE AT AN UNIVERSITY
Leadership. Google Dictionary defines it as "the action of leading a group of people or an organization." Thesaurus.com listed related concepts and synonyms of it, such as administration, control, and authority. Chester Barnard defined it as "the ability of a superior to influence the behavior of a subordinate or group and persuade them to follow a particular course of action". However, most importantly to me, leadership represents what we learn from the actions we accomplish that aim at making the world a better place, instead of just focusing on leadership for sought positions or other leading purposes.
The concept of leadership is not new to me. I first got a sense of leadership while peer and group editing essays within French class in my freshman year. This experience spoke to the possibilities that result from teamwork. Moreover, it made me realize that I have what it takes to be a leader. The way I best see myself playing a leadership role at the university either as a student or as an alumnus is to be model student. Exemplary morals will I stick to, perfect grades will I seek, a high self-esteem and self-confidence will I thrive for, and ameliorations around me will I try to achieve through volunteerism. Leadership has its requirements, and I believe good communication is one of them. The way I perceive it, communication is an almighty opening door to tolerance, to open-mindedness, and to a better understanding of our surroundings and the happenings in our lives. I intend to enhance communications between the university's members through a suggested "communication skills improvement" club and projected researches in this area.
Involving people and oneself to actions needs knowledge and skill, implacability, and determination. But leadership is a give and take process. As much as I believe in myself, I also expect university to sharpen my abilities. In fact, I have grown aware of my capacity to understand and get along with people, dedicate my time to teaching and raising awareness, but mostly, and more importantly, to an ongoing learning. In spite of that, although I have some skills, I have a long way to go. And I know that the Boy leader that I am can't wait to become a man leader and to make a greater impact.
I have a minor problem with the tone at "The concept...ongoing learning". To a reader, this section comes off as a little arrogant. With some fine tuning of words, this section will go from the tone of "I rock" to "though I have some skills, I have a long way to go" that the second half of the paragraph takes. If you need any help with that let me know.
Also, after you finish, if you could look over my essay, that would be greatly appreciated.
