What is something you created that makes you especially proud, and why?
Here's what i have so far, but not sure if i like it. Should i start over with a new topic? Or go with this and just make some corrections?
The things I have created that make me especially proud are the bonds I have formed with all the friends I have made throughout the course of my life. I have personally always believed that in true friendship we are able to find happiness, and this has shown in the connections I have made with all of the people I call my friends. I am proud of myself for establishing these bonds because true friendship is not easy since true friendship is not just being liked, but being understood, and also understanding. As my departure for college approaches, I am proud of the lifelong relationships I have made so far and I am eager to find more of these true bonds wherever I may be.
This seems like an interesting idea, but a little bit too vague. I would instead jump into something immediately that exemplifies the bond that you and your friends have. To be honest, I feel like many people could slap their name on this answer and it would work just as well. Make it more about you.
I think it is okay to talk about friendship for this topic. Make sure, however, that you include specifics in your essay--what types of experiences have you had that have made you realize the importance of your friendships? Stuff like that.
Theres a strict 700 character limit, so it's a bit restricting. But here's one with at least a little more specificity:
My friends and I do anything and everything together: from making trips to the mountains to go skiing to simply sitting in someone's basement talking and laughing with each other for hours.I have always believed that in true friendship we are able to find happiness, and it has shown in the connections I have made with all of the people I call friends. I am proud of myself for establishing these bonds because true friendship is not easy since true friendship is not just being liked, but being understood, and also understanding. As my departure for college approaches, I am proud of the lifelong relationships I have made so far and I am eager to find more of these true bonds wherever I may be.
Yeah those word counts can be tough.
I think the second version is definitely a step in the right direction. I think it tells a better story than the original but I would edit it a bit. Its a little wordy. Especially here:
I have always believed that in true friendship we are able to find happiness, and it has shown in the connections I have made with all of the people I call friends. I am proud of myself for establishing these bonds because true friendship is not easy since true friendship is not just being liked, but being understood, and also understanding.
I think that your ideas are good. Add a personal touch to it, your flair. maybe a short phrase that's significant to you and your friends (names you call each other, unstated agreements, inside joke) or a specific person, moment. I wrote about my mom and me. And maybe find other words for friendship, you use it a little bit too much. I wish I knew about this website when I was writing my essays.
