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The locket. Last words my sister said to me at the airport



bilal ABUZENAH 15 / 80  
Oct 31, 2009   #1
The Locket...

"Take it Bilal. It's yours". Those were the last words my sister said to me at the airport. It was a small bag; I didn't know what was inside it. She just told me to open it in "Amreka". When I was in the airplane, I was curious what was inside the small bag, Then I said, "I'll wait till I reach America".

After the airplane landed, I decided to open the little bag , When I opened it, I saw a letter and a little gold thing. First, I read the letter. It said, "This may help you to get the directions if you get lost", then I picked up the little gold thing. It was a locket, when I opened it, I saw a compass on one side and a picture of my mother on the other side. I held it to my chest and cried for a moment. On that day when I went to sleep, I put it under my pillow, and since that day I couldn't sleep without the locket. This locket means a lot to me. It's a gift from my sister. Furthermore, it contains my mother's picture; when I face any obstacle, I look at my mother's picture and imagine her in this situation, what she would do and I do the same. This locket is always in my pocket, also it has its place in my heart.

byflash 2 / 11  
Oct 31, 2009   #2
I am a bit confused.
Are you trying to tell a story, or should this answer a question?

"Take it Bilal (period ) It's yours".

She just told me to open when I reached Amreka.
maybe quotations around Amreka so that it isn't misconstrued as an actual destination.

mqybe "gold thing" can be a little less...amorphous-sounding

what she would do and I do the same.
EF_Kevin 8 / 13053  
Nov 3, 2009   #3
...inside the small bag. Then I said, "I'll wait till I reach America."

On that day when I went to sleep, I put it under my pillow, and since...

This is excellent! Seriously. It is short and simple, but it achieves something that other narratives do not. You created a real experience for me as I read this. Good luck, I feel enthusiastic about your future as a master of language.
OP bilal ABUZENAH 15 / 80  
Nov 3, 2009   #4
thanks so much...may you please check my poem on Poetry Writing section. ....
thank you again...


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