I came across a storybook the other day that my dad once read to me at bedtime: The Ugly Duckling by Hans Christian Andersen. Growing up, I always associated with The Ugly Duckling because I lacked the grace, beauty, and social skills of my three older sisters. I used to listen as high schoolers appeared through the doorway of our house every Friday night, while I was upstairs as a third grader learning equations for my accelerated math class. My family praised my accomplishments in school, but what they never knew was that I would have thrown away all my "success" in a heartbeat if I could have been just like my sisters.
I once was a shy person around unfamiliar people, overcome with anxiety when I was required to tell the waitress my two-word dinner order at Chili's. I was chained by the dread that everyone was judging me. Consequently, I relied on the observations I made of my sister's lives to learn how to go about talking to people and making friends. As a result, when they left for college, the Ugly Duckling was lost endlessly swimming in a lake of awkwardness and confusion in every social situation she encountered. In high school I was left to start over in the social aspect, but cross country became my savior.
I joined the team because I was still persistent on being just like my sisters, which included participating in all the same activities them. During my first day of practice freshman year, I apprehensively advanced towards my new teammates. After my long trudge forward, I recognized a few faces from junior high, but I did not have the confidence to approach them. Working up a sweat and standing alone in the midst of the stadium bleachers, my anxiety urged me to flee from the array of faces. Then a girl approached me and introduced herself. I still felt a bit intimidated by the myriad of strangers around me, but my new acquaintance was also a freshman and invited me to run with her. As practice went on, I met many of her friends and by the end, one hundred strangers were not so strange after all. For the first time in a while, I felt as if I belonged somewhere. My new friends helped me physically throughout the season, by motivating me in practice, but also socially, by familiarizing me with several new friends.
Although my four years on the team are over, I know I have made friendships that will last a lifetime. Cross country gave me the confidence to be a leader and break my social anxiety, but most of all; the wonderful friends I have made gave me the self-worth to believe in myself and pave my own path for the future. My three biological role models may have been my downfall in the social sense, but in the end, I am thankful because I would not have found cross country without them. I am much different from my sisters, but I love the person I have become. I have made my debut as a beautiful, graceful swan, fully transforming from my life as the ugly duckling.
I once was a shy person around unfamiliar people, overcome with anxiety when I was required to tell the waitress my two-word dinner order at Chili's. I was chained by the dread that everyone was judging me. Consequently, I relied on the observations I made of my sister's lives to learn how to go about talking to people and making friends. As a result, when they left for college, the Ugly Duckling was lost endlessly swimming in a lake of awkwardness and confusion in every social situation she encountered. In high school I was left to start over in the social aspect, but cross country became my savior.
I joined the team because I was still persistent on being just like my sisters, which included participating in all the same activities them. During my first day of practice freshman year, I apprehensively advanced towards my new teammates. After my long trudge forward, I recognized a few faces from junior high, but I did not have the confidence to approach them. Working up a sweat and standing alone in the midst of the stadium bleachers, my anxiety urged me to flee from the array of faces. Then a girl approached me and introduced herself. I still felt a bit intimidated by the myriad of strangers around me, but my new acquaintance was also a freshman and invited me to run with her. As practice went on, I met many of her friends and by the end, one hundred strangers were not so strange after all. For the first time in a while, I felt as if I belonged somewhere. My new friends helped me physically throughout the season, by motivating me in practice, but also socially, by familiarizing me with several new friends.
Although my four years on the team are over, I know I have made friendships that will last a lifetime. Cross country gave me the confidence to be a leader and break my social anxiety, but most of all; the wonderful friends I have made gave me the self-worth to believe in myself and pave my own path for the future. My three biological role models may have been my downfall in the social sense, but in the end, I am thankful because I would not have found cross country without them. I am much different from my sisters, but I love the person I have become. I have made my debut as a beautiful, graceful swan, fully transforming from my life as the ugly duckling.
