Hi,
I need urgent advice on my essay draft, this is my first time writing essay for College, I aim to get into FIT (Fashion Merchandise Management Major) this Fall 2010, it seems running out of time, but I need to submit this week.
Direction: What makes you a perfect candidate for FIT? Why are you interested in the major you are applying to? We'd like you to tell us in an essay. This is your chance to tell us more about your experiences, activities and accomplishments. (No more than 750 words, please.)
**
To be one of Fashion Professional leader,
In the flight to New York in 2007 winter, I was very excited dreaming about my future as a merchandiser in fashion industry and completing FIT degree and gaining experience in the fashion industry in New York. At that time, I got a new job in Product Development for Designer Jewelry Company/ Stephen Dweck in New York. One of my goals is to achieve a degree in Fashion Merchandising Management at FIT.
Back to 6 years, I had been developing my career both in product development and production department at Nine West and Kate Spade in Korea and gained experience learning how a fashion wholesale company operates through the development stage to production and finally the customer. Working in those fields, I solidified my dream and major for which I will be a leading professional. After that, I got to be able to opt for my major which part of department I am really fit into.
I believe that there are some requirements to be a good leading professional, such as persistence, patience under high pressure, experience in international background, creativity, fast pace, organizing skill, career-minded and bilingual.
I felt that my personality fit in to this field, I have meticulous side and would rather say myself as a very organized person. In fashion field, organizing skill is the key in complexity with high pressure in fast paced field as well as creativity at the same time and affirmative decision on right spot and right timing. For example, when I worked in Korea, I worked mostly 12 hours daily and 6 days a week accomplishing more than 5 different responsibilities in communicated with design team and factory, such as sourcing new materials, sampling, pricing, calculating material quantity according to order quantity, placing orders for each material, keeping delivery date and etc. It requires very precise organizing skill, I have done it for 6 years continuously and based on those, I could get into Jewelry company in New York, where I have been learning American Business manners, how wholesale company to work with retail companies, as well as business English and etc.
In my future, I 'm planning to work in Korea, as to the Korean Fashion Industry, there are companies which have factories in China and Southeast Asia. They oversee the entire production with direct communication with overseas brand, as well as companies which have their own brand and advertise and distribute their merchandise domestically. My dream is to be a general manager specializing in merchandising, finding new brands abroad and approaching the domestic market, as well as planning whole collections by season. I think it requires good eye to pick appropriate merchandise for a target market as well as having an accurate perspective in the fashion industry.
In every way, Fashion Merchandising Management in FIT is essential to me and I'm ecstatic to have this opportunity to apply to your program. I aim to be one of the leading fashion experts.
***
Thanks for reading my essay and really appreciate it!
I'm looking forward to your advice,
Carrie
During my flight to New York in winter of 2007, I was excitedly dreaming about my future as a merchandiser in the fashion industry, completing my FIT degree, and gaining some experience as a professional in the fashion industry in New York. At that time, I got ...
More than six years ago, I was already developing my career both in ...
In my future, I 'm planning to work in Korea's Fashion Industry.
There are companies which have factories in China and Southeast Asia.
They oversee the entire production with direct communication with overseas brands , as well as companies which have their own brand and advertise and distribute their merchandise domestically. ----- good sentence!! Your intelligence is easy to see in your writing. You make mistakes, just like most bilingual people, but we all make mistakes when writing. Keep practicing by reading English aloud. For example, people say "the fashion industry." I want to work in fashion industry. I want to work in the fashion industry.
