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Mechanical engineering / high school accident) - Virginia Tech statements


ghdud1234 1 / 1  
Feb 12, 2012   #1
i need your help!!!

What are the top five reasons you want to attend Virginia Tech?

First of all, Virginia Tech has great Mechanical Engineering programs as people know that engineering school in Virginia Tech is famous in the world so that it can help me achieve my career goals.

Secondly, students from other countries are attending Virginia Tech more than other universities so that I can learn their cultures and how to treat by meeting and spending time with them.

Third, when I visited Virginia Tech in last winter, I was attracted by the school. Buildings related to engineering schools were technically developed and looked beautiful.

Forth, Virginia Tech is geographically fit for me. The most important reason why I mentioned," geographically" is because of Washington DC. Washington DC is one of the most well developed cities, so a number of companies involving with Mechanical Engineering are located in Washington DC; therefore, I can have internship in the companies during my optional practical training period. If I have an opportunity to intern in the companies, it will be very helpful to my career.

Fifth, I think that people living in a rural city are more kind and friendly than people living in an urban city. In my experiences, people are so kind and familiar to me in Kilgore I am living now; in contrast, when I visited New York, people did not smile and just looked busy and cold, so I prefer a rural city.

For these reasons, I want to attend Virginia Tech.
- What do you consider the greatest benefit(s) of a diverse educational community?

In a diverse educational community, by meeting and communicating with well educated people, I can broaden my knowledge , and can learn useful communication skills which are important in many things such as a job interview, making friends, and taking classes. For example, in job interviews, communication skills are really important for appealing about me. Interviewers will consider whether a person can adapt to the society or not. In order to be adapted well, communication skills will be essential, especially for me, an international student. Improving communication skills are one of the steps of achieving my career goals.

Free response - writing sample

When I was in high school, I had an accident that I dropped my first smart phone called LG Optimus. After I dropped my phone, I went to service center of LG to fix my phone. However, they told me that I should buy a new one unless I had to pay about three hundred dollars. I decided to disassemble my phone and just try to fix by myself because, in any case, it became a trash. After disassembling my phone, I was shocked by elaboration of the structure of my phone. Inside of the phone, it looked like a small town. I suddenly wanted to know about these structures, how it was made, and their functions in the phone, so I started to search for the information on the internet. It was amazing how structures work with other materials. I thought that they have their own rules in being located, and they must be where they are to work the phone even tiny buttons. If I touch the one of them and put it back with wrong way, I thought it would be never fixed, so it was really interesting for me and gave me inspiration. I decided to study about mechanics.

Jennyflower81 - / 690 96  
Feb 13, 2012   #2
You should avoid using the phrases "first of all, secondly", etc. because it distracts from the true meaning of the paper. Zoom in on the reasons you are applying to the school and state them clearly. Create a flow between words and sentences, and let your personality show through! I would elaborate on your career goals a little, and try to be unique. You have some grammar issues:

Virginia Tech has a renownedgreat Mechanical Engineering program,andpeople know that engineering school in Virginia Tech is famous in the world so thatand the skills taught there willit can help me achieve my career goals.

When I visited Virginia Tech in last winter, I was attracted byto the appearance of the school. Buildings related to engineering schools were technically developedmodern, and looked beautiful.
OP ghdud1234 1 / 1  
Feb 13, 2012   #3
Thank you for your helping!


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